Champions of LOVE

It was a beautiful, wonderful day and what a glorious sun that hung in the sky! Mythal practically burst through the door of the chocolate warehouse, a seemingly melodic hymn playing as he stepped foot in the place. He was dressed in an elegant, pressed white tuxedo complete with an ivory cane and a sportful top hat, tied with a silver ribbon. He spun the cane around his finger and then tucked it beneath his armpit as he dramatically dipped his hat, temporarily hiding his face. “I hear…” He started, a glimmer of light flashing from beneath the top of his hat before he lifted it up, much to the praise and adoration of the workers on the factory floor. “That you’re in need of a champion of love!”

“Oh my! It is Mythal Ragnos!” A trio of women cried from behind him, the fangirls that were always following after him and his love. Speaking of which, the God Slayer twirled on the tip of his feet until he was before the workers holding the baskets of chocolate. “Well today, you have the honor of employing two champions of love. The charismatic Mythal Ragnos and his wonderful wife, Serilda Sinclair!” He introduced her with excitement, dramatically thrusting his cane towards the door to point at her approaching person.

In came his wife, dressed in all the frilly, silken glory that one could possibly ever be covered in. She came right to him, the winds of love and care carrying her right to him. Her lips met his and as they parted, a literal pink heart floating up into the air above them from their lip-lock and burst into a glittering shower of light and color. She swept away from, grasping the chocolate baskets and hoisting them into her hands.

“Our love shall best all that dare challenge it!” He announced, proudly, his hands clamping onto his hips as he struck a heroic pose. As she danced her way to the door, he followed after, leaping like a gazelle in the woods. As they emerged from the factory, sweet-smelling puffs of delight rushed through the air to all the world around them. As they moved with all the grace and beauty that a true loving couple could have, they found their way decidedly blocked by four young children. Their eyes were glowing with excitement and hunger, as the sweet aroma of chocolate had reached their noses and enticed them to feed. They clamored and squealed as they rushed the couple, desiring to take the candy for themselves.

“Not today children!” Mythal called out as he waved his wand, releasing a puff of black smoke. As the kids dove into the smoke, they found no purchase in their grubby grabbing. Indeed, Serilda and Mythal were now a street over, rushing down it in joyful, reverberating laughter!

Upon their amazing escape from the poor, hungry children, his wondrous wife declared that they should have children -- at least a dozen! “Oh my beautiful Seri,” he exclaimed, waving his cane before him. “Let us populate this world.with the children of our love! Dozens, even twenty or so! We will fill this world with our amazing offspring and they will become new champions of our love!” Oh the very idea of populating this wonderful world with their children filled him with such delight.

But what was this? A man sporting a dangerous, heart shaped gun? And he was pointing it at his love and trying to steal the candy! “You fiend!” He decried the man, swinging his cane around and whacking the gun away. As the man tried to right himself, Mythal rushed forward, jabbing his cane's end at the villain several times! Each one carried a part of his magic and each impact released a smoky heart that floated up into the air. After plenty of strikes, the man let out a defeated yell and fell backwards. “Are you okay, my love?” he asked his wife, scooping her into his arms.

With the children avoided and the candy stealing fiend defeated, they were only yards away from their glorious destination. Once their task was complete, Mythal would whisk his lovely bride off to their cottage in the woods and make sweet, sweet love to her all night – in hopes of starting their litter of lovebugs. He carried her through the street when, lo and behold, the shop was only a little bit away! They could tell it was their goal, as a bright rainbow and dancing tree elves hovered above its roof, a veritable candy wonderland for their gifts!

“Our love will carry us through all trials and tribulations!” Mythal declared boldly, spinning in his step as he planted a sweet kiss on his wife. It was then that a dark cloud moved in upon their fairy tale, a brooding woman who scoffed, snorted and gagged at their actions. The God Slayer blinked in surprise at the woman’s words as he gently let Serilda down onto her feet. “But what is better than our celebration of love? All people should yearn and enjoy love!” He said with a wide and glowing smile.

“Not me! I, Karen Lemesethemanger, will have none of it!” The angry woman snared as she tossed her pumpkin spiced latte over her shoulder. She pulled out two throwing knives, each like a fraction of a heart, and flung them at Mythal with all her strength. Though the weapons went flying past him without impact, the God Slayer still exclaimed in pain and fell onto his back, bouncing a few times as he hit the ground.

“No… her anti-love… it is too strong,” he practically whispered, clutching his heart. Oh what would they do?!

Oh he suffered. Oh he ached! This anti-love was so toxic, so painful – he could hardly stand it! Suddenly dark, wicked thoughts entered his mind. Thoughts of going onto the lacrimanet and tricking men into thinking he was an attractive woman seeking love. Ideas of going into stores and complaining loudly about products and yelling when they didn’t accept his coupons! As Serilda kneeled beside him, begging him to stay, he reached up for her, wanting nothing more than to hold her one last time. “Seri, my love…” he whispered pitifully, clutching her hand tight.

His wife turned her pain towards their aggressor, begging to know what could have caused such mishap and disdain. And she sought to defeat it! To teach her the ways of love and affection and the true beauty that came with it! Her words reignited the flames of his passion, washing away the dark and malicious thoughts that had dared enter his mind! He pushed himself up slowly as Serilda marched against the hater of love, her body taking each impact with a slight falter in step but without breaking down. When she reached Karen, she dipped her into a passionate, deep kiss that poured love right into the woman’s very soul!

And with it, came new energy into Mythal’s heart and soul! He sprang to his feet and rushed back his bride, sliding to a stop behind Karen as she finally wrestled herself free and tried to fight off the love bubbles that attempted to worm their ways into her heart. “Love Layer Secret Art!” Mythal called out, doing an intricate and complicated set of hand signs that connected to the deepest recesses of love. Karen had just enough time to look back before the entire area was caked in pink and gold, a bright light that warmed and tantalized all. Mythal appeared just past the woman, his hands now spread to the sides. “1000 Cupid Arrows!” He finished the chant as Karen’s body stiffened, several hundred heart bubbles rushing off her body. She was nearly defeated, her anti-love near gone.

“And the finale!” Mythal grabbed the woman by the wrist and spun her in as elegant as any dancer would. There he dipped her down and mimicked his wife’s action from her, kissing her with all the love and passion he could muster. Karen squealed as her body was overtaken in a bright white light, lifting into the air. All of her features that had been so reprehensible and thotish melted away and as she settled down on the ground once more, she was now the very image of beauty and love. She had become a goddess of adoration.

“Thank you for rescuing me from that cursed anti-love spell. Let me repay thee both by becoming your faithful lover!” She cried, pulling them both into a deep and passionate hug.