An Evening of Truth

Road to Redemption
How long it had been, Xavier couldn’t really tack down. One would think, considering how traumatic it had been, that the moment would be marred into his mind like a scar, repeating the time, date and moment over and over again. To a point, it was but the smaller details didn’t really matter in the grand scheme of things. All that continued to plague him, weighing him down like an anchor, was the sight of Saffron’s face, the utter tragedy of realization beset in her features. It haunted him, kept him restless in the dead of night and followed him wherever he went. He hadn’t returned to Confidence International, sending a message to the administrators to run things as smoothly as possible while he took a sabbatical. His band was kaput as far as he understood it; he didn’t have the courage to check in with Nik or Emma, assuming that Saffron had spoken to them about what had happened.

Instead he had returned to his ‘roots’ and found himself on the street. He had significantly more jewel to use, so he wasn’t living on the streets per se as much as he wandered about without any particular place to stay. He shacked up at inexpensive motels as he moved about, taking up residence in bars through most of the days before going to find places to crash at night. The routine repeated itself over and over again, more times than he cared to count. He didn’t help himself by repeatedly playing Saffron’s voicemail when he allowed himself a moment of peace, to even consider not feeling guilty.

Problem was, he knew he couldn’t run away forever. Avoiding the problem and the situation was what, arguably, put him in the exact mess. After several months, after a particularly liquid night of downing booze to bring him to his lowest low, he’d finally had enough. If he wanted any chance to explain his side of the story, to make up for all the damage he’d done, he needed to be a damn adult and own up to his mistakes. It wasn’t going to be easy and it wasn’t going to be pretty but he knew it was something he had to do. Taking out his phone, he took forty minutes to work up the gumption and the appropriate words to formulate a text to Saffron. It read:

I’ll be at Solemn Park in Talonia. Tomorrow at 7 PM. I’ll explain.

Of course, there were several drafts where he tried to go into further detail but it seemed so… cold. Explaining it through the phone was insulting at best, heartless at worst. And there was no telling the kind of anger she still held within towards him; allowing the situation to go on longer probably had only made it fester. All he could hope was she was willing to come and hear him out. Maybe she’d understand where he was coming from, maybe she wouldn’t -- he highly doubted she would. But if nothing else, he would speak his truth, for better or worse.

The following night, he stood under one of the tall lights that had been erected in the park. It was, admittedly, a dangerous place to set himself, in case anyone decided to take him out in one swift motion. He couldn’t really blame them. His hair had gotten longer and unkempt and he hadn’t shaved since the incident, his usual sense of style the last thing on his mind. He wore a long black trench coat and a semi-nice black suit beneath it. His hands were tucked in his coat’s pockets, as the fall air was cold and biting, the early hints of the soon arriving winter. His gaze remained down towards the ground, seemingly separated from his own body as he stared at the pavement below his feet.

Road to Redemption
She was late, if she was even coming at all. Granted, Xavier hadn’t worked up the nerve to look around at all, terrified of raising his eyes and finding her standing there. He’d asked for her to meet but now every single fiber in his being was telling him to run away again. He’d never been such a coward before but with it involving Saffron… it made him feel so weak. A stark piece of evidence that proved just how much he cared for her, though he imagined that was a moot point. There wasn’t any chance in hell that they were going to be in a good place in a very long time, if ever. Maybe that’s why he really wanted to run; the realization of that was nearly enough to take the wind out of his sails.

Despite her being late, he wasn’t planning on leaving. He’d give her two hours maximum before he assumed she wasn’t coming. She hadn’t answered his message back with any kind of confirmation, not that he had expected any. The cold fall air was nothing against the bitter feeling he held inside anyways. He simply stood and stared at the ground, caught in a swirl of different thoughts and emotions that ran so rampant, it was like nothing was happening in his head at all. Soon enough though, he heard the sound of someone approaching. His nerves somehow were shot even more and he had to practically force his body still so as not to vibrate right out of his skin. By the time she had stopped in front of him, he knew that it was her. He could practically feel her rage radiating off of her.

He was just as silent as she was for whatever length of time it was. He knew he should probably have said some kind of greeting or… something. But what the hell was he supposed to start with? After that length of silence, she seemed fed up and demanded he begin speaking before she started beating on him. His eyes flickered downward more, if only slightly. After a few moments of his mouth opening and closing, failing to provide any sound, he finally swallowed hard and began to speak. "When I came to Earthland, I saw it as a second chance. An opportunity to start fresh, wipe away all the shit from Rhaegar. Stay away from my people, stay away from… Vandrad. He’d won and I hoped that if I was here, it meant other people from my planet were too. But shit just… kept coming my way and connecting back to him.”

"Despite that, I kept on my goal. New life, new goals and whatever shit came with that. Then during a job that turned bad, I was… saved by some woman from another plane of existence. She called herself Bast and knew all sorts of things about me from when I was on Rhaegar. She also said that an enemy of her’s, Ulthar, had found a way to possess people that were part of the du Wolffs. It was him that had influenced Bacchus to abandon my pops and she believed he was influencin’ Vandrad too. She wanted me to help save him, save all of my people from his corruption…I said yes and she gave me some of her power.”

He paused, frowning softly. "I had no idea how connected you were to him when we met. I was… shocked to find someone else I ran into, only degrees of separation from him. But despite that shit, I didn’t… I never intentionally tried to get information out of you about him. I know you pro’lly don’t believe that but it’s true. I wasn’t gonna press it, mostly because… well, because I liked ya.”

He scoffed slightly and reached up to wipe away a few stray tears that had escaped. "Stupid, I know. ‘Specially because I’m sure you know by now that Mercury and I… there’s no excuse. I was plannin’ on telling you everything right before it all went down. It just felt like too much but… some things changed my mind. And then Bast said it was time to roll so we rolled.”

"But things went sideways. She was telling me all’a’sudden that I had to kill Vandrad, that he was too far gone. I’d told her before that I didn’t want to kill him, hell I didn’t even want to fight him! I tried to talk to him but I… went about it the wrong way. But now she’s saying the only way to save him, to save everything was to end him right there. It just… it didn’t make sense. Sudden change outta nowhere. I told her no, that I wasn’t gonna do it. And that’s when you…”

He fell silent then, unable to continue at the moment. He’d still kept his gaze downward, ashamed and embarrassed and unable to look her in the eye. "I never wanted it to come to this. I just wanted to… help people for the first time in a long time.”

Road to Redemption
Of course he knew how it sounded. It was absolutely insane. How he could possibly make it sound reasonable, even believable, was beyond him. Of course, trying to find a way to manipulate it would then be yet another manipulation, to add onto the list of what he’d already done. All he could do was tell her the truth of everything that had happened. To her credit, she listened to it all without slugging him, quietly taking in the information so that he could get it all off his chest. After a moment of silence on his part, indicating that he had finished, she finally spoke up, circling back to Bast and the overall, suspicious mystery of her existence and offering to help him help his people. She was fairly unimpressed with his willingness to go along with it, to not question it at all before agreeing to her terms.

But despite all that, she refused to believe that Vandrad was under some kind of manipulation. She firmly believed that he should have understood him better, should have been suspicious of that belief as Vandrad would not let anyone sway his way of living his life. But she wasn’t even buying that; she circled back to the fact that he had a very easy answer for his issues. Mercury had told him, to his face, that all he needed to do was talk to Vandrad, to approach him as a man and sit down with him. Instead he had opted to try and catch him by surprise, to attack him and expect him to cooperate. He had chosen poorly in every decision, up to and including his way of treating her.

She got angry then, her voice raising and her presence putting an even more palpable tension in the air. She accused him of using her, despite his insistence that he didn’t, stating that he became aware of her connection to Vandrad very soon after meeting. And to go completely radio silent for a whole month without an answer, after fleeing from the scene of his crime and then just send her a message as if she was waiting with baited breath for a response from him. She was insulted, infuriated and broken and she stabbed at him with her words as she dashed any belief in his genuine care for her because he wouldn’t even own up to his own mistakes at that moment by looking at her.

More out of instinct than anything else, his head finally lifted up. It felt cheap, as if he was only doing it because she had said something. But he couldn’t stop himself, a surge of ache, pain and sadness washing off of him to crash up against her own woe. His own eyes were wide and glassy, tears slowly drifting down from the corners to stain his cheeks. She kept on, claiming he had broken her heart by lying and twisting her around him for his own selfish reason. She demanded to know if he’d ever stopped to think about her feelings, how she would have felt about being with the man that had hurt her friend’s family. He could have stopped it and made things right before it got too far, keeping himself from getting physical or, worse, making her fall in love with the character he was pretending to be.

It was humiliating and she knew that she’d lost something that was gone forever. She couldn’t handle the weight on her shoulders, on her soul, of having spent time with the man that had killed so many of the du Wolffs. And none of that included what he had done with Mercury, someone that she considered a friend. He’d gone and wrecked not only Saffron’s life but he’d damaged Mercury’s as well. Saffron turned away from him, reaping the blame on herself as much as him for that, as she hadn’t established any kind of boundaries or commitments. She’d just hoped that he would have been patient and committed despite all of that, as he had been enough for her.

"Saffron, I-...” he started, as if any kind of explanation or excuse would magically pick up the decimation. His lips trembled openly for a moment before they closed again. "No,” he said softly. "You’re right. I can’t explain why I trusted Bast; something about her made me feel like I could. And at the time, I didn’t really have anyone else… but that’s no excuse. You’re right. I was given everythin’ to do things right and all I did was fuck it up. I was selfish because I wanted to get to know you without the cloud of what I did, what I was, hanging over me. I was afraid to talk to Vandrad because then you’d know who I was and then…”

He didn’t need to say it. Once she had found out, things would have been over. He reached up to wipe some tears away. "I know it ain’t worth anything but… I’m sorry. I fucked things up royally and I ain’t looking for pity, understanding or nothin’. I just… needed to tell you. You’re right, I should have come beggin’ on my knees that you’d even give me the time of day, not sending you a message without notice.” He swallowed hard. "Maybe I believed Bast because I wanted something to justify all of my hatred and anger towards the du Wolffs. Or that it wasn’t really them, that Vandrad’s granddad didn’t really just turn his back on my pops and leave ‘im to die.”

Truthfully, he didn’t think he knew Vandrad well enough to understand how hard he’d fight. Sure, he’d heard stories about some of the du Wolff’s resolve and he’d seen enough of the future king’s tactics during the rebellion to know how intelligent he was. But that hardly mattered at the moment.  "I’m sorry… I’m just… I’m so sorry…”

Road to Redemption
He didn’t really know what else to say. He could apologize until he was blue in the face but he knew it wasn’t going to matter. Xavier had done the kind of damage that apologies didn’t magically fix -- in fact, he wasn’t even sure there was anything he could say or do at any point that would begin the process of healing. Saffron dismissed his apologies, taking a moment to wipe away any stray tears before she turned back to face him, her face showing what he could only describe as disinterest. She claimed, coldly, that the only reason that she had come was because Vandrad had strongly suggested she do so. As far as she stood, she would have been happier for the future king to be standing there rather than herself.

After a moment she continued, her tone not as sharp as she expressed her understanding about his father, apparently more susceptible to understanding than before. It seemed to hint at something further but not something he believed he had any right to ask about. She told him that the answers he sought, the reason behind his father’s betrayal, may be beyond his reach and he had to come to some kind of acceptance with that. It was as hard of a hit as anything she’d said so far and he had to fight back the wince at the comment. Of course saying as much and accepting it were two different things and it was clear he wasn’t quite ready to begin that path of acceptance. Especially when he had so much more he needed to make up for.

But she moved on, going to bat for the du Wolffs and stating what she had seen and felt around the family. They even spoke of Bacchus with flowery compliments, something she equated to all of the family, despite situations when they should not be. It was not hard to figure that he was the primary suspect of that particular statement, as she continued and spoke of the other Rhaegarians that had made it to Earthland. She looked at him and explained that his own people, the ones that he had hurt, had still spoken kindly of him, talking about how the loss of his father had hurt him and how he’d struggled to move past it. They knew where his anger and cruelty had been born from and had nothing but pity for him. Even after he’d been revealed and Saffron had told them about what he’d done, Cyrene and Vandrad had spoken in his defense, at least to the source of his agony.

Neither one were excusing what he’d done but they still understood where it came from and, apparently, showed some level of forgiveness for it, though she made it quite clear she didn’t believe he deserved any of it. It was a driving force behind her point to stop and use his brain rather than blindly obeying the whims of some entity beyond the borders of their world. And it seemed she wasn’t done; she insisted that Xavier direct her to Bast personally, so that she could list out issues she had with the woman as well. "I don’t know if that’s possible,” he said softly. "She was pretty pissed I didn’t follow through on killin’ Vandrad. Something about all the negative energy bein’ too much. I told her to kick bricks and I haven’t felt her presence since. Sorry…”

"I don’t know where to go from here. But I’ve… probably wasted enough of your time. I just wanted to explain and… say how sorry I am.” His gaze shifted downward slightly. "I imagine Vandrad and them will be the ones comin’ to find me next.”

Road to Redemption
Saffron was quick to tell him that if Bast were to ever speak to him again, he needed to make sure she understood that Saffron was the vanguard of anyone she may target. As far as she was concerned, the entity from beyond was an enemy and if she made any kind of move against the du Wolffs or anyone she even slightly cared for, she’d go out of her way to bury Bast herself. Xavier nodded softly; he wasn’t entirely certain Saffron could kill Bast, or that anyone really could. But he knew if anyone could find a way, it was the Fairy Tail mage. With that it seemed that their meeting was drawing to a close, though there was still something hanging over them that hadn’t been spoken about. As he made reference to his wanted status, believing that he would be hunted down, Saffron told him point blank that Themesycia wanted him caught and brought in immediately. His gaze lifted back to her as she ran down, again, the reasons the former duchess would want him captured, stating that he was the second most wanted man on their list.

There was a pause as they looked at one another. Xavier understood what Saffron was looking at him for, staring at him with a hard understanding of what she had said. By all rights, she should be the one to drag him in for justice. But she continued after that tense moment, stating that Vandrad had asked her to meet him without the intent of capturing him. He’d understood how personal it was and didn’t want to involve politics where it didn’t need to be, at least not at the moment. So for the time being, he was a ‘free man’ until someone came for him, her theorizing that it was probably Mercury or Cedric.

Yet she offered him a third choice. She told him that if he wanted to make up for all the wrong choices he made, he could man up and turn himself in. She didn’t really want him to come to Fairy Tail and force her to be the one that did it but he had several other options to whom he could go and turn himself in. As far as she saw it, it was the best means of taking action and responsibility for what he’d done rather than just talking about how sorry he was. He scoffed slightly, better defined as a mirthless laugh. "You’re right. I’ve spent enough time on the run…” he said quietly.

But she wasn’t done. She offered an olive branch, a first step to redeeming himself, if he was willing to tell her all about Seberg. His eyes snapped up to meet her’s in shock, wide as plates. She confirmed that he had arrived on Earthland as well and had proven to be a handful. She also confirmed that it was Seberg that she had fought twice, the man she had told him was the target of her suicide mission. Words couldn’t possibly describe the look on his face as he attempted to process everything she was saying. "Hold on, Seberg was the guy you had to fight? And you’re… alive?” He simply couldn’t believe that. No one had ever fought the maniac before and come back alive. And she had done it twice? No wonder she felt he was going to come at her -- there was little doubt in his mind she was right.

"Seberg is a menace, a walking weapon of destruction. He’s also one of, if not the oldest Rhaegarian still alive. Our people they… we live an extended period of time, on par with immortality. The kicker is that we do die out, usually from an accident or disease or war. Rhaegar has seen its share of rebellions and massacres. He’s never told anyone his exact age but I know he’s ancient. But he’s not…” How could he put this in a way that made sense? "I thought Seberg was coming to kill me. My pops had agreed to ally with Bacchus and he had it out for the du Wolffs, though he always held off for… whatever reason, he never said. He showed up within a day of the rebellion’s end and told me that he could do me a favor, if I gave him the green light to ‘play’ with the du Wolff survivors on the planet. I was still so… angry that I agreed. I might have been terrified too. I had moments where I thought about stoppin’ him, to stop the killin’ but… he’d remind me of what they’d done and I got angry all over again.” He shook his head, realizing he was just reminiscing and not actually providing much information. "You pro’lly know more than me now. I only heard stories about him, I never saw him fight. I know he keeps to himself, prefers to stay in places where others don’t frequent. I didn’t think he was capable of feelin’... well, anything. But if you scared him or made him angry?”

"Saff, you… you gotta be careful. There’s no telling what that monster will do to get back at you.”

Road to Redemption
Of course he knew that she would already understand where she stood with Seberg. If nothing else, the psychopath was very straightforward and easy to figure out, at least in terms of his mannerisms. But she wasn’t planning on hiding, if only so Seberg didn’t go hunting for her family. He nodded softly in understanding before she continued, stating that she probably had more to give him than he had for her. She reiterated the information that she had told him when they’d reciprocated after the fight, though she went into far greater details than she had before. Apparently Seberg had absorbed the weapon they’d attempted to use on him, the one that had made Vandrad so weak when they’d first met. And there was no telling what kind of damage he could do now that he’d made it his own. That wasn’t even including the fact that he could apparently halt time on a whim, making him a truly terrifying force to be reckoned with. Cyrene had mentioned that he may have had an awakening, which caused Xavier to close his eyes and sigh softly. He knew very well what that meant, though he’d never dared dread what would happen if Seberg had achieved it. It was a rare occurrence outside of highly stressful situations and the rogue Rhaegarian had caused several awakenings himself during his hunts, though they had all ended in death and failure.

Though all was not lost. Seberg didn’t know where the rest of the Rhaegarians were at the moment, though once they became an official nation, that advantage was out the window. And based on Saffron’s tone, it sounded like it was coming sooner rather than later. She’d prefer to be done with him before then but given how lucky she’d been so far, she doubted her luck ran that deep. Her and Cedric had just barely escaped death, if only due to the timely intervention of Seberg’s ally, Maker. And the second time, Saffron had pulled out her own miracle in time to save them all, though it seemed she had little to no control of her newfound powers. If she had the time, maybe she could work on mastering it but given how she had embarrassed him, Seberg was probably already on her trail.

He hated that he couldn’t provide her with more information, his shoulders drooping slightly. "Sorry,” he said again, even as she looked up at him. There was the briefest of moments where he thought he saw something outside of anger and hatred, something he didn’t dare even hope to think about. But just as quickly as he’d considered it, she gave a shake of her head and instructed him to leave her out of anything he decided to do, as she didn’t care. And without as much as a goodbye, she turned and walked away, leaving him to stare at her retreating back. Of course instinct screamed in his ears to call out to her, to say… something.

But there was nothing to say. He’d said everything he could and she had said everything she needed to. He watched her for several moments longer before he turned and walked in the opposite direction. He paused just long enough to look back at her before he gave a small shake of his head and continued on.

Two shadows moved nearly at the same time, perched on different buildings on opposite sides of the park and unaware of the other. The one closest to Saffron rose up slightly, still out of view of her and watched as she left. Its head shifted to look back in the direction of Xavier and let out a noise akin to a scoff, as if it was dryly amused or putting pieces together. Without any other noise or indication, it turned and disappeared into the night.

The other was far more bold, stepping partially into the light, though he was still high enough up that Xavier couldn’t see him. The grim facade of Cedric stared hard at the former God-King as he turned out of park and made his way towards the public transit. Cedric walked parallel to him on the buildings, bounding from rooftop to rooftop to stay nearly in stride with him. He wasn’t sure where the guildmaster was going but, wherever it was, he knew how it was coming to an end.

New Rhaegar wanted him brought in alive, so that he could be held accountable for his crimes. On some level, the former Dread Master understood that and knew he should honor it. But Xavier had hurt Saffron, hurt Vandrad and betrayed Mercury’s trust. That wasn’t even including the list of atrocities he allowed or put forth on his home planet. However repentant he was, and based on what he could sense from him during his conversation with Saffron, he was, Cedric frankly didn’t care. Xavier deserved to die for his actions and Cedric had taken it upon himself to act as judge, jury and executioner.

He just needed him out of the city and away from Saffron, in case the Fairy Tail mage came running with some reminded comment she’d wanted to throw at him. Xavier boarded the bus and as it headed out, Cedric teleported himself on top of it. He expected the guildmaster to get out somewhere along the way, heading back to whatever place he’d opted to use for the night. Cedric had zero faith in Xavier going to turn himself in; he’d crawl back into his hole and, after his emotions simmered down, he would realize he didn’t want to be incarcerated and probably judged for execution. Cowards were all the same. The bus carried them out of the city and along the main road, with the former Dread Master sitting on the top of it and waiting.

Nearly an hour and a half later, he was surprised to find that Xavier had rode the bus all the way to Crocus. As his quiet fury turned to confusion, they came to a stop not two blocks from his own apartment. His eyes snapped to the sight of Xavier walking away from the vehicle, specifically in the direction of his home. Was he… going to his place? Or maybe Cillian’s? The latter seemed unlikely; he’d gotten along with Cillian but not really enough to warrant a night visit after such an emotionally driven encounter. Cedric frowned as he focused on his apartment and teleported inside. All the lights were out, just as he’d left it. He turned one light off in the kitchen, enough to show the slight hue of illumination from the window in the main room. He stepped into his bedroom and parked himself by the window and… waited.

It wasn’t a few moments later that Xavier appeared from around the corner, heading in his direction. He was coming to the apartment and Cedric could only reasonably deduce that he was coming to his apartment. Saffron had said that he knew where Cedric lived, offering him up as an option for surrender. But of all of the choices, that should have been the most unreasonable. It wasn’t like the Saffron had pretended they hadn’t had a physical relationship and however casual that had seemed or not, they were certainly still friends. Was he hoping for some kind of pity? He should have gone to Mythal and Serilda’s for that. They would, at least, follow the law.

He hissed in annoyance; he was technically a Rune Knight informant as well. Murdering an unarmed man, however guilty of crimes or not, would look bad if it was discovered. He could just grab Xavier and teleport him somewhere into the stratosphere and drop him. Hadn’t he flown when he fought Vandrad? At the bottom of the ocean then. Who knew what that armored suit he had was capable of withstanding though.

He got up from the window as he heard a knock on his door. His hand twitched furiously as his heart pounded in his ears. No, he’d own up to what he did then. One swift strike and Xavier would be no more. It would bury whatever hope he had of being with Saffron for good but better to punish the man that had broken her heart. He reached for the door and swung it open, finding Xavier standing there before him. His eyes flared with anger, his lip twitching even before the former God-King could speak.

"Hi… Cedric…” Xavier said softly. "Listen-”

Cedric’s fist launched forward and slammed into Xavier’s face. It knocked him back into the wall, though not hard enough to put him through it. Clearly the guildmaster wasn’t prepared for it because he slumped to the floor, knocked out after the one hard blow to the cranium. Cedric scowled at himself, reaching up to scratch the back of his head.

Damn these people he’d grown close to. All of their soft emotions were getting the best of him. He reached into his pocket and pulled out his phone, speed dialing Mercury. “Merc, I’ve got Xavier. Bastard came to my door to give himself up. I… may have punched him. But he’s still living. You better send Vandrad here quickly before I decide to amend that.”