[EVENT] Home is Where The Heart Is [Percy/Leon]

God, he wanted a break before the dinner. The thought of following up something as intense as this with a meal with all of the same people made him want to run, but...even as Leon presented him with an out, he couldn’t take it. “Ha...” he half sighed, half laughed as everyone cleared out. The legs underneath him felt foreign and weak, but he wouldn’t show this weakness to Leon. That wouldn’t help the clearly struggling man at all, and he was here to support. “W-What do you mean? Of course, I’ll go. It’d be rude not to, especially since I threw your brother over the bar counter. I’m not sure I could make it any worse,” Percy said, making a confident stab at humor in the face of sheer mortification, but being unable to completely contain the stuttering mess lurking beneath the surface. In any case, he met Leon’s eyes once he finally looked at him, offering him a wry smile.

Reaching out, one of his shaky hands patted Leon’s arm, which was a little awkward since Percy was the one out of the two of them who had a little trouble with physical touch outside of sparring and when he was sick. “Don’t apologize. There was nothing you could do,” he said, the events with Alphonse replaying in his mind as if someone had recorded his biggest fail. It was a mess, but eve if Leon had been there, he doubted anything would have changed. Hearing that wavy haired jackass say such horrible things about Leon... imagining him using that disgusting cigarette to burn him... The result would have been the same. Even now, a flash of anger rushed his face before immediately ebbing away.

“Your d-dad reminds me a bit of mine, actually. Good to know I’m not the only one with a t-tense family. Nothing I can’t handle,” he told Leon earnestly, and it was true. While being familiar with it did nothing to lessen his nerves or the knots in his stomach, he had dealt with this type of thing his whole life. It had been even worse when Grandfather had still been the official patriarch. As deceptively placid as it seemed Lucarius Dagger and Adam Hoffman could be, Mephistopheles had the power and the overbearing rage on a short fuse to go with it. However, when either of the male authorities in his life exerted their power in any way, Percy had always gotten nauseated enough to throw up from nerves alone. It was no different now, though he had a handle on it. As long as he stood still for a few moments so he could settle.

Once he felt like he could move without either tripping or throwing up, he dropped his arm from Leon’s and made the first move toward the door. “I wonder what he wants to discuss with you guys,” he idly wondered, sliding his trembling hands into his pockets and wandering into the hall despite not having a clue where the dining hall was. Some tour he’d gotten...

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Once at the table, Percy sat in silence, knowing it all had nothing to do with him. Obviously there was nothing he could say or do. He’d already done plenty. Still, as Leon’s father spoke to Leon, the Dagger was smacked with both indignation for his friend and intense guilt. It was enough to make him drop his eyes to stare blankly at his empty plate, nearly cringing as he suffered silently in self-loathing and general disillusion with the world. Why did things have to be this way? While he didn’t regret coming to aid Leon, he deeply regretting coming to his family home. More regret by the second. He’d made things worse for the exiled Hoffman and things were clearly already very bad.

It was funny how motivated he was to stand up for Leon when he couldn’t even stand up for himself in very similar situations. How he wanted Leon to tell them all to screw off, that he didn’t need their approval and come back to his life in Fiore without all the worry, and yet Percy couldn’t do that very thing in his own similar situation. It was easy to see that the two things didn’t line up, yet there was nothing he could do about it. He’d just have to suffer in the nonsensical hypocrisy of his own mind, where he understood and sympathized, but also hated it and expected something different. There weren’t enough apologies in the world that he could give Leon to make up for what he’d done, but he’d still have to try once they were alone. If his friend still wanted to even look at him. Percy’s hands fidgeted in his lap nervously, but out of sight of the anyone not seated beside him. Good thing the floor was so sturdy, otherwise the agitated bouncing of his leg would have jarred the long family table.

Once the serious matters were discussed and it was time to eat, the two-toned man made himself a small plate, basically just enough to be polite but not so much that he couldn’t make it look like he ate it. He probably shouldn’t have come to the dinner either. As much as he was here to try and help Leon, he’d done the opposite. Mistakes seemed to be all he was capable of today, which arguably was the theme of most of his life. He’d just forked a piece of squash to nibble on when Leon’s mother spoke, promptly drawing his attention away from his plate. She wanted to know a little about him. Unsurprising, though her kindness was unexpected given the climate of the household. “I’m nineteen, ma’am,” he replied quietly, mustering all of his taught social graces so he wouldn’t seem as nervous and sick as he felt. ‘Always be strong’, as his father said, but for him, it was more of ‘always appear strong’... “We met at a gym in Fiore,” he continued, heavily amending their meeting story. Given that he’d launched one of her sons over a bar today and it was being shouldered by her outcast son, telling her they met while fighting and then had some tense run ins until a certain event seemed very ill-timed. She’d think he was some sort of violent maniac. Maybe he was... “We discovered we had some things in common, and eventually I hired him to work for me,” he said with a slight smile, glancing over at Leon to check his expression.

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At first, the lack of response in Leon’s face made his stomach twist. He wouldn’t blame Leon for being mad at him. Honestly, it’d be more surprising if he wasn’t. Let, seconds later, it seemed Percy’d just have to be surprised. The sudden, warm pressure on his knee halted the nervous bouncing immediately, both from drawing attention to it and because of the weight. To Percy it was unclear if the action was just to stop the potentially annoying motion or if Leon was trying to comfort him, but regardless, his cheeks warmed a little and made his otherwise paled cheeks seem more normal now. The dark haired man he’d grown so accustomed to was far more likely to reach out and touch him when words and expressions failed, and this was a situation where it seemed he didn’t feel comfortable speaking at all. That was valid, but made it more glaringly obvious that this comforting thing should be going the other way around right now. A little unsure what to do to reciprocate in a way that would benefit his friend, Percy stopped picking at his nails and brushed the fingers of one hand against one of Leon’s rough knuckles before they came to rest almost as if they were going to curl around his pinkie finger. Obviously just placing his hand over Leon’s would have been the easiest, but...he was hesitant. Tentative. Even if Percy was awkward with all things tender, it was clear enough that the hand did comfort him. He sighed silently to release some of the tension, moving his eyes away from Leon and back to his mother. “Yes, ma’am,” he answered, then turned his head toward the next person who spoke to him.

It was Henri now, the nice-looking one who seemed to take after Leon’s mother and be less horrible than Alphonse and Claude. Percy smiled back, about to answer him since conversation seemed to be a little easier, but the relief lasted only a second before the guest dud was reminded of the nastiness lurking around the table. His eyes flashed to Alphonse, defiantly meeting his gaze, though he tried to seem mild since he knew he was being watched. Without thinking, Percy’s hand went from grazing the edge of Leon’s to properly covering the back of it with fingers curling around. He squeezed as if to contain his wave of discomfort, though not enough to cause any pain. It was almost like he was anchoring himself down. It was so hard to choke back his own retorts, especially since he’d already lost his temper with the red-eyed sibling once. But no. He didn’t need to defend himself and his job. That would just seem desperate. Screw him. Let him think Percy had no worth and no job. And, admittedly, it was absolutely weird that he was here right now. He knew that, but he also didn’t care. He was a weird guy. Possibly making it worse, Percy ended up with just the smallest smirk as he shrugged a shoulder as if he didn’t care one way or another what Alphonse thought.

Now, the shift that came after that...Percy didn’t know what to make of it. He could be quite dense, so even though he and Leon were basically holding hands under the table, Claude’s comment sailed over his head in the most spectacular way. What did he mean they weren’t really friends? Did Claude think like Alphonse? That Percy was just basically buying Leon as nothing more than a tool, or pity, or what? Yes, this family dynamic was royally screwed up, but was it really so baffling that someone on this planet could find Leon valuable enough and pleasant enough to be close friends? His brows knitted and he scowled, but he was silent about it.

Then, to somehow lighten the mood again, the little sister spoke. Marie and Claude’s interaction was confusing, but at least this one he could figure out. It seemed Leon’s little sister might have become a little enamored with him. She was young and he was the weird stranger in the house, shaking things up. It was probably pretty normal, even if he did think himself quite unattractive with he burn scar and the different hair colors. If he’d been in a more relaxed environment, he might have snickered, but as it was, he could only take his attention off of her for her own sake and return it to the sibling with the glasses, whom he’d now answer. “I’m the head of research and development for the medical science and technology division of Dagger Corp, my family’s company,” he answered Henri with a small smile and went back to eating at least a couple of veggies off of his plate.

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Ah, crap. Things had started to turn around for the better, judging by Leon’s smile finally making an appearance, but as it seemed to do on the Hoffman rollercoaster from hell, it promptly took a nosedive back into the completely awful. Percy was a bit at a loss at how casually they were throwing around their deaths. Yes, they’d mentioned it before, but it’d been in the heat of anger. This, while still jaded by the fight, was more calm where words could be considered before said, yet out it came again. A sad look settled on his face as he looked from face to face around the table, unable to fathom the disdain they held for Leon. It was like he was a beast. Some sort of lower life form. Not an animal, because those could be pets, and generally pets were treated well. They treated Leon like he was some disgusting mutant beast that couldn’t be good for anything, and it made him feel horrible. Sick, sad, angry, and hurt for him.

Raising to his feet a few seconds after Leon had and just as they received permission from Adam to go, Percy ducked his head politely. “Thank you for the lovely meal,” he said politely, as was expected, then turned and strode off after Leon.

Respecting his friend’s silence, Percy followed a handful of steps behind the taller man, hands balled at his side as he walked. Now that they were officially out of range of the immediate cause of a large part of the...mess, he was being viciously battered by all the emotions he’d been repressing as best he could for the last hour or so. A tension headache had settled into his brows and temples. His empathy for his friend twisted his insides, his anger had him still a little hot under the collar, his regret from the incident haunted him, his uncertainty about how Leon was handling the mess he made, and most bothersome of all, the terror that one or both of them actually would die like his brothers kept bringing up, all compounded as they walked.

Once Leon walked into his room, Percy quickly followed. He barely noticed it was a nice room as he lingered just inside the door, as if he wasn’t permitted any further in at the moment. Hand-knee touches aside, he still wasn’t convinced that the wrongly treated Hoffman would still be accepting of him, given all that had transpired. The youngest Dagger did his best to try and seem calm, not wanting to add any more negativity to Leon’s already extensive storm cloud, but there was only so much he could do. Social things were already a nightmare, and this one had been a downright night terror! The two-toned man was frazzled to his core, having to clasp his hands to make sure they remained steady. After a little more silence, Percy inhaled deeply and spoke. “I... I’m so sorry, Leon.” he said, glancing up through the hair that had fallen into his eyes. One giant blanket apology for all of it.

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Percy tensed for just a second, still unused to how fully physical a hug was, but also ultimately accepting of it if only because it was Leon. This wasn’t Alphonse’s arm slung around him, unwanted and with ulterior motives. This was the man that, while he was admittedly back to being guarded and awkward about it, ran his fingers through his hair while he was sick and provided a deep comfort he hardly recognized that he needed when he was ill, let alone when he wasn’t. At the end of it all, Percy was just as touch-starved as Leon, but instead of seeking to fulfill it at every chance, his lack of outlets growing up taught him to just accept it stow it away back in the recesses of his mind, shut away in a dusty old box covered in cobwebs. He’d only get it during sparring, which is maybe why he liked it so much. Fighting and wrestling with Artemis and Wallard were the closest to hugs he ever really got. Sometimes he got a hug from Artemis when things were really and truly awful, but Percy was usually too distraught to really accept the comfort from someone who was at least a small portion of his problems. Wallard, being the head of staff and the untitled nanny of the kids, wasn’t able to show parental affection, so he could only offer sparring as the ultimate outlet for the strong emotions Percy often needed to work through and some encouraging pats on the back.

“I’m the one who’s supposed to say weird things,” Percy muttered with a small, amused smile. Recharging batteries? He didn’t really get it until he melted into the warmth, leaning his head forward just a little to press his aching forehead into the warmth of Leon’s neck. He was feeling a little better suddenly, releasing a deep sigh just as Leon had. His arms came up and wrapped around the human bear pressing against him. Even after all of this mess, Leon wasn’t angry with him. That was a load off of his shoulders, though there was still a lot of stress retained in those muscles. He couldn’t help but keep returning to the events that might unfold tomorrow, and while he was still stubbornly fixed that both of them would come out alright, he wasn’t stupid. He was terrified. War was hell. But for right now, all he had to worry about was Leon. Leon and his shirt that did, in fact, smell awful now that his attention was drawn to it.

“Yeah, that’s probably a good idea,” he said, reluctantly pulling away from the man. One arm lingered around the muscular frame of his friend while the other came to the front of his button up. Tugging it up, he untucked it slightly from the front of his pants and lifted the expensive fabric to his nose, giving it a sniff before he cringed. “I didn’t realize that many different alcohols splashed me. There...might not be many intact bottles left,” he commented almost lightly, but then his expression darkened. It was the cigarette smell that kept getting to him. Just...linking the cigarette between Alphonse’s fingers and the burns he’d spotted on Leon... It made his blood boil. He’d never been fond of the habit anyway and found the smell annoying to his sinuses, but now it was directly linked to a nasty man who had used his own brother as an ash tray without an ounce of remorse. A filthy-mouthed man that proceeded to hit on him. As he relived the recent memory once more, he could still feel the way that thumb had been pressed to his chin, not tenderly or out of attraction, but more appraisingly as if he was cattle being examined before purchase. It’d made Percy feel disgusting and vulnerable and scared. Maybe that was ultimately what had forced him to act so unbecomingly in the Hoffman family home. Percy knew he was strong and could protect himself. He didn’t have to let Alphonse make him feel that way, nor did it have to be okay for him to say and do such things to his own brother. Anything other than action was a sick compromise that made victims of everyone, and Percy refused.

Just smelling the smokiness lingering on him made his stomach twist, so he reclaimed his other hand and started hurriedly unbuttoning his shirt to shrug out of out of it. The urge to get the smell off of him was strong, as was the need to wash his face where it’d been touched. “It smells like him,” he muttered, tossing the garment in a random direction, far more focused on what his tight undershirt smelled like and if he’d need to remove it too to get Alphonse’s close, predatory face out of his mind. Luckily it smelled only lightly of alcohol and only that, so it could wait.

Out of mindless instinctual need, Percy reached out and gently grabbed the bottom edge of Leon’s shirt as if to keep the man from leaving his sight. “Where’s the bathroom?” he asked, though it was heavily implied that he wanted to be shown. The thought of walking anywhere in this house by himself, or even being alone in this room, was unnerving.

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Percy just stood there, looking exceptionally uncomfortable and confused. While there were a few similarities in their families, this was a large deviance. Everyone in the Dagger household was private. Everything was private. Bathing was definitely private, in their own separate bathrooms attached to their rooms. Leon and Percy had already crossed quite a few of Percy’s boundaries, anywhere from rubbing backs while violently ill to the whole debacle at the Singles event, but... he’d never seen another naked person before outside of the confines of his degrees and medical procedures. So he’d never seen a casually naked person. In such close proximity. In such an...intimate situation. More intimate than he was used to in any facet of his clinically cold and distant life.

His eyes trailed around the room again, trying to answer his own questions before asking them and sounding dumb. Did they all just get naked together, or were there towels to wear like in Midian bath houses? Something to wrap around to provide from modesty? He didn’t bring anything to wear in a bath. Taking a bath in his underwear seemed... pointless. It really did seem to be a communal thing, which made him think this was cultural. He didn’t want to seem ignorant toward his culture. He glanced at Leon, then to his belt. The whole ‘we take a bath before they all start coming in’ thing wasn’t just strange wording after all. It’d been quite literal, which he’d missed. “Uh,” he faltered, continuing to stand frozen in the middle of the bathroom for a second longer before he finally moved. “N-no,” he responded, not wanting to make what seemed like a normal thing to Leon weird.

Turning his back to the man for the illusion of privacy, he started to take off his shirt. This was fine. Despite incidents, this was no different than showering with dudes in the communal area at the gym or in school after a sweaty basketball game. He hadn’t done that often, preferring to go home to clean up, but there had at least been a couple of times in school that he’d had something to do immediately after P.E. and couldn’t wait for the shower area to completely clear out before he bathed and changed. This was just like that. It wasn’t, but he was telling himself it was. Percy was very good at talking himself into things, even if it meant fooling himself. Shirt off, he undid his own belt, button, and zipper. Seconds later he was stepping out of them and standing in his boxers. This was the make it or break it moment. With a deep breath, those dropped as well and he made a quick dash for the water and hopped in, grabbing a washcloth and bottle of soap on the way. He moved to the far corner of the tub, strategically placing the washcloth, and kept his eyes down until Leon joined him. Well, mostly down. For some reason, he kept peeking and then reminding himself not to look. He was blushing a little no matter how calm he tried to seem, and it was clear as day that he was self-conscious and bashful over being nude. “I’ve...uhm...never seen a bathroom like this,” he said quietly, one hand idly swishing through the warm water.

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That pain from earlier in his lab came rushing back immediately when Leon brought up the glaring truth that their time together was apparently drawing to an end. After he made sure Leon survived, for some reason the dark-haired man wanted to stay behind to be sold and Percy would be leaving to go back to his solitude. The empty lab. His face remained tilted down toward the water as Leon poked his head. Maybe he was just feeling raw from all the stress of the day, or maybe it was just the intense vulnerability of bathing together, but either way when he lifted his face, it was obvious that the two-toned scientist was miserable. He was trying to keep it together, but he was losing his ability to remain his cool exterior.

“Yeah, it’s...too bad. I would have liked to see,” he said quietly, eyes meeting Leon’s. “I bet there’s a lot of cool magic. Maybe I can come visit? Would you be allowed...” he couldn’t finish his question. His throat closed off. Somehow he knew that if Leon stayed behind and he went home, they’d never see each other again. As a servant, his time wouldn’t be his anymore. He knew no plans could be made and kept. The thought of it was more than he could really take. “I hate it,” he said suddenly, through a wavering scowl. “I’ll...miss you. And I hate it!” His voice was thick with emotion. Even though he knew exactly how Leon felt and why he had to stay behind, as an outsider to the situation, it just hurt. Staying behind with these people who treated him so poorly? His eyes lowered to the scars on Leon’s face, then to the ones on his chest, which he hesitantly reached out to touch. Why did he have to stay here with people who abused him when he could come home and they could keep spending time together? Leon had been happy in Fiore. He’d liked coming to the lab. They enjoyed each other’s company. The sparring, the work, the lunches, and dinners. Even when they sounded like they were going to kill each other while they fought or played Swap, it always ended up in smiles and laughs eventually. They’d conquered BOVID together. If everyone he finally felt comfortable with was just going to leave eventually, Percy regretted letting anyone into his life begin with!

By the time he looked back up from where his eyes had settled on the bathwater, there was moisture brimming on his good-eye’s lower lid. It was too much. He was scared of being alone again. He was scared of how life was before Leon barreled into his life and pinned him against the wall, asking him what his problem was. He was scared that Leon would be miserable forever just because he felt it was his fate to be here in Bellum and be sold to someone. “Leon, i-it sucks...” he stammered, pouting. It felt so undignified, sitting in an oversized bathtub crying in front of another grown man when they should be soaping up, but there was no stopping it. All he could do was squeeze his eyes shut and lower his face again, tears rolling down his left cheek while the other eye just burned and turned red.

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Each rapid heartbeat was somehow more painful than the last. As many times as he’d been hurt and put in the hospital, this pain was somehow worse. It felt like he was dying or wished he would so it’d stop. His chest hurt worse than when the Fairy Tail guild hall had tried to crush it, even though he knew this wasn’t a physical pain. Percy was familiar with physical pains and a little less with emotional ones, and especially no anguish like this. Maybe that’s why he was so weak to it, why the tears wouldn’t stop even as Leon wiped them away and pressed their foreheads together. They should have never met. They’d both be blissfully ignorant. Percy wouldn’t be having to come to terms with the fact that not only did he have a best friend that he’d soon never see again, but he had fallen for that best friend in a way he now knew was incapable of being called platonic. Due to his family’s old-fashioned ways, he should be elated that the problem was solving itself without barely a hiccup, but...

As Percy was pulled into Leon’s embrace, his arms came up out of the water and wrapped around his neck. Though he usually wasn’t one able to give such tender touches, the young man almost cradled the head on his shoulder as if it was the most precious thing he’d ever encountered. One hand tangled in those inky dark locks of his, while the other rested on the back of his neck. “I’m hic s-sorry I complicated things,” he said, body shuddering from a barely repressed sob. It was a loaded statement with so many connotations, but no, he had to stop this. It was one thing for him to suffer, he’d suffered a lot, but seeing his own misery reflected in the man hurting in his arms was enough to give him the strength to compose himself. With a couple of deep breaths, Percy staved off the rest of the panicked, pained sobs and tears started to come less quickly. He had to be strong for his friend. He’d repressed plenty of negative emotions in his time, he could do it again.

“It’s ok. I’m sorry, I just had a moment,” he said quietly, but more evenly than before. Perhaps too evenly. It was obviously fake, he still felt like he was dying, but there was no need to tear Leon apart over something that couldn’t be changed. “We still have a little time left. I-“ His voice broke, so he took a second to clear his throat before he continued. “I won’t ruin it. I wish it was different, but if it can’t be changed then...it was better than nothing,” he said, leaning his head against the one he held.

Percy’s mind raced for solutions. He was a man who tried to fix everything, from himself to everyone else’s problems. This one stumped him. Any attempted fix was hollow and sad. They could still talk on the phone, but that wouldn’t last long. It would just delay the inevitable as they both tried to fill the void left in their lives with busy work. He could try to make Leon hate him by the time he left, that way he’d be glad to see him go...but that was a one-way fix. Percy didn’t know if he could pull it off if his heart wasn’t in it. Even now, with their bodies pressed and Leon’s scent filling his mind, he couldn’t imagine purposefully hurting this man, even if it was for his own good. How could he when all he craved was this closeness? Leon probably wouldn’t fall for it anyway. He knew him better than anyone, in a way that no one else had taken the time. Leon knew Percy as Percy, not as a Dagger and all that entailed. Just thinking about it nearly sent him back into sobs, but he resisted. He’d just barely tremble in Leon’s arms, savoring it as if it’d be the last hug he’d ever receive.

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For just a second, literally the smallest of specks of time, Percy's hands rose in surprise to press against Leon's chest as if to push him away. Not out of disgust or that he didn't want it, but out of deeply rooted upbringing. His family was old-fashioned. Leon was a man and so was Percy. It wasn't allowed. He should resist. But... he was about to march into war and he was in a country far away from anyone he knew. While he needed to be accepted into his family and didn't need even more things to make that more unlikely, he also needed Leon. He didn't want to resist.

Even though he could force blissful ignorance on himself about things he didn't want to acknowledge, he knew something about himself that was terrifying and forbidden. He'd first learned of it with his friend Dagda when he'd discovered he was capable of having crushes on guys as well as girls, but that'd been safe. Dagda liked women exclusively, so he could just daydream and suffer the random errant thought, but ultimately he could ignore it or chastise himself in silence. The danger with Leon was that he wasn't sure how the man felt. It wasn't clear whether Leon was the same as him. They both participated and remembered Singles Night, though Percy had left with the distinct shame that Leon hadn't been as into it as he shouldn't have been but clearly was. Leon had been able to get at least a little into it then, shown by the cursed handcuffs themselves. Perhaps he'd misunderstood. He saw that now. It was probably good he hadn't seen it then, or he'd have cut off ties with Leon. Or was that bad? He was confused.

Leon's approach to the kiss was just exactly right, though. It was aggressive and unapologetic, both things that Percy was into but didn't know it yet. It lit him on fire, and before he knew it, his body was reacting on its own. Whether he'd ultimately decided if he was going to give in to his heathen impulses or not, the two-toned man was returning the kiss the best he could. It was intense and he was inexperienced at best. He'd only ever kissed one other person, and it was an acquaintance he had no hidden feelings for. This was one he wanted. His body pressed against Leon's and his arms wrapped around him eagerly. They remained this way even as the man pulled away and asked him something.

A furiously blushing and dazed Percy opened his eyes, trying to process the question. Oh, right. Last time he'd felt like this, he ran away. "N-no.." came Percy's husky, stuttery, and breathless reply. He seemed almost irritated that Leon had pulled away, or maybe that he'd brought up that embarrassing moment. Maybe both. "N-not this t-time," he stammered, pressing his fingers into Leon's back. With their faces so close, Percy's lips grazed Leon's. He was tempted to press forward to initiate his own kiss, though it'd pale in the face of the one he just received. He was inexperienced. Uncertainty and nervousness crept in. Percy didn't know how to do attraction and affection. He didn't want to mess this up, so he hesitated.

If he was going to hell, might as well do it up right. With that infuriatingly defiant look creeping into his eyes, he glanced into the golden hues that he wanted to never stop seeing. He wanted to forget that this would all mean nothing in a few days. He wanted Leon to kiss him again, as dangerous as that felt. Adrenaline pumped fast and hard in his veins. "Again," Percy said in a low tone, his own brand of huskiness steeping his higher octaved voice.

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Percy was dizzy and tingly and hot and cold at the same time. It was overwhelming the way that Leon was coming at him, but he enjoyed every second of it. Just as he thought his lungs would burst, the man would pull away and allow him a breath before coming back just as hard if not harder than before. Always the quick learner, the two-toned man adjusted to their rhythm quickly to return his kisses as best he could. He wasn't even aware they were moving until the cool edge of the tub pressed against the hot skin of his back and he flinched.

As difficult as it was with all the panting and just general kissing noises, Percy was trying so desperately to be quiet, vaguely mindful of his family lurking nearby but not so much that it interfered with his desire to keep going. However, as Leon broke from his lips and started down his jaw, a small yelp of pleased delight escaped his lips once he planted a particularly firm and passionate kiss on his neck. It was a new sensation, one that left him gasping and squirming but wanting more when he stopped. Staring up into Leon's face, it was clear that his potential lover, no matter how short on time they were, was basically losing his mind. It was Singles Night 2.0, with Percy a complete blushing mess beneath him, only slick and dripping with bathwater. He pouted momentarily at the pause, but then he was gifted with something pleasing.

This time, the red was spread over Leon's face too, which Percy seemed to enjoy very much. With a dazed smile, he reached up and pressed his hands against the hot cheeks hovering over him. Most would probably be intimidated by the beastly hunger in his always-intense face, but not Percy. If anything, it made him more eager. Excited. Maybe a little scared, but his lust-wires were a bit crossed anyway, so it was only a good thing. 'I like you,', Leon said. This brought a breathless chuckle out of the flustered young man. "I-I would...hope s-so..." he huffed, his hands sliding slowly from his cheeks and down Leon's rugged skin. He wasn't aware that he was capable of feeling this level of lust for another person, but Leon wasn't the only one with a hungry gaze. He couldn't get enough of Leon's skin. He'd always been very tactile with things he liked, though that had never extended to people since he had that pesky touching issue. But Leon wasn't people, and Percy was slowly learning to express himself with words and touch, even if they were baby steps. Well, baby steps until now. This was like a crash course. "Otherwise, I-I'd feel cheap," he grinned crookedly.

Sure, he was avoiding talking about his feelings as usual... or so it seemed. But then he lifted himself up a little, wrapping his arms around the strong neck above him for support. Leaning forward, he placed his lips on the lobe of Leon's left ear. After giving it a little extra attention and a nibble, hoping to make the dark headed man feel as good as he was, he whispered into it. "I like you, too," he said softly before lowering his head and planting a firm kiss on the pulsating vein in Leon's neck.

It was hard to tell if it was the urgency of their situation that made them so desperate and reckless for each other or if it was just months of pent up feelings, but now that it had started, it was avalanching. Everything could change tomorrow.

[wc: 605 || total: 27867]

Percy was a sweaty mess, resting back against Leon while trying to catch his breath. His hair had mixed together into the most comical of ways, glued to his forehead until he reached a shaky hand to slick it back. He looked exhausted but pleased, yet also extremely embarrassed. It was cruel to put him in front of a mirror like that. The embarrassment was about to kill him, but at least he could say he saw some pretty interesting expressions on Leon's face. He tried to ignore the thought of what his own face had looked like. The embarrassment was starting to get to him so badly that he was tempted, once more, to run, but Leon's whispering in his ear drew him back in. He liked the feeling of the man's lips against his ear and his mouth. A shudder ran through his body, though now he was seeming quite bashful. "Mhm... like you, too," he muttered, attempting to turn his face away but, of course, Leon couldn't have that. Rough fingertips were on his jaw pulling his face back around for a kiss, which he gladly returned. It was hard not to tear up again since he was coming down off of a surge of hormones as well as considering that this could be their first and last time. Was it wrong, what they'd just done? That their first times were their last and they'd still done it knowing they would soon part ways? Was it a mistake?

The poor boy missed the knock. As the door cracked open and Henri spoke, Percy nearly leaped out of his skin. With a strangled cry of surprise, he jerked against the man he was seated on. If Leon hadn't had a tight hold on him, he probably would have either dove into the tub water or skittered into a back corner to hide. Imagining being caught by anyone was enough to make him panic, but by anyone in Leon's family while in their communal bathroom? The thought alone would have had him turning red, except he was already about as red as he could get.

Thankfully, while he stayed quiet during the interaction, Leon and Henri's conversation was short. He caught his name but was too foggy-minded to try to translate the rest. The door closed and Percy exhaled a breath he hadn't known he was holding. Hearing Leon's native tongue was a treat that he'd miss now that he'd been blessed with it. It wasn't fair to feel so sad after something so intense...

And painful. "Ah-" As Leon grumbled that they needed to leave through his squinty glare and scowl, Percy slipped off his lap into the water to at least get a quick rinse before pulling on his clothes and found himself wincing on shaky legs. He was sore. He tried to work through it, doing what he needed to do before scurrying out of the water and stiffly moving to his towel and clean clothes. He barely dried off enough to dress, pulling on his white T-shirt, underwear, and cargo pants. He didn't look his usual well-dressed self, nor did he even bother with his belt. The exhaustion was too strong and he was terrified the family would bust in. It seemed that their break from reality only staved off the heaviness of the situation, though he did pause to fondly run his fingers over the marks on his neck. This was going to be difficult to get over, wasn't it? Would he ever get over this?

Once in the hall on their way back to his room, Percy once more grabbed onto the hem of Leon's shirt, as if the man would disappear if he let go. His steps were a bit slower than usual, despite the urgency to get to the safety of the bedroom. He physically couldn't walk any faster, and the obvious implication of his slowed gait brought a flush to his cheeks. Oh, he couldn't even think about it. Now that the moment was over, thinking about it all was just so...flustering. How could he have done that!? His free hand rose and covered part of his face.

His first time...had been with a man!

[wc: 705 || total: 29392]

Percy was envious of Leon’s ability to just take what he wanted. Something as simple as pulling him into a hug and covering him with kisses was a milestone that, despite their very recent intimacy, was still a milestone beyond his reach. At least then Leon initiated it, it was easier to engage. He leaned heavily back into Leon, powerless to the embarrassing touches even as his face heated back up. His hands slid over Leon’s and held them. “It’s fine, d-d-don’t worry,” he said shyly, pressing his cheek into the side of Leon’s head. He was cute when he was cuddly and pouty. He'd always found Leon attractive, but it kept becoming more obvious. “At least you can finally say you got the better of me,” he attempted a joke, of course referring to all those times in training where Percy never so much as broke a sweat while he taught Leon the nuances of professional hand-to-hand combat. He was really gonna miss that and thinking about it almost made him cry again. “W-We finally found something you’re better at than me,” he continued to try to tease to make him feel better, but Percy was not nearly as stoic as he imagined himself to be. His heart was simultaneously full and breaking. It was a strange, conflicting feeling that was almost overwhelming for the man who tried so hard not to feel too much.

Holding Leon’s arms a little extra tightly for a moment, both because he wanted to preserve the good memories they’d made and so his one-time lover wouldn’t see his eyes redden again, Percy memorized how it felt to be embraced so tenderly, passionately. As far as he was concerned, this was his one and only encounter with such a thing. He doubted he’d ever experience again. Maybe that was just the dramatic thoughts of a young man since he was only nineteen, but it felt like this had been the perfect storm that could never come about the same way twice. Percy was a solitary man, as seen by his unused entertainment room in his lonely, empty house. Social interactions were rare unless someone went out of their way to see him, which no one did. And like heck he’d ever attend another Singles Event. Even if he was desperate enough to try and find someone again, it could never happen in the chaotic but perfect way it had. If anything, he could feel himself pulling more away from the world in the wake of Leon’s inevitable departure. There wasn’t much about it that interested him at the moment so he'd just hide in his lab.

Suddenly emboldened, Percy came to a decision. Leon might be a man and his best friend, but... “I don’t regret it,” he said firmly as if affirming it not only to himself but to Leon as well. If this had been his one chance at feeling this way, he was glad he felt it instead of always wondering what’d it be like. To be completely accepted as an imperfect being by someone who just wants to be with you and enjoy you, while also making you feel good was a gift. “I’m glad it was with you. It’ll always be special.”

With that, he twisted in Leon’s arms and faced him, putting just enough distance to awkwardly pull him by the hands toward his own bed. Percy had intended on sleeping on the couch, but that seemed pointless now. Considering the lines they'd blasted past and what loomed ahead, Percy was going to be selfish. Once he got to the bed, he slipped back out of his pants and crawled in with his shirt and boxers serving as pajamas, since he hadn’t brought any in his haste. Reaching for Leon’s arm, he tried to pull him in with him. “...w-would it be too much to ask for y-you to lay here with me for the night? Just t-tonight...” Percy wanted to recreate the hazy memory he had of when he was sick, where Leon had gently held him to keep him warm and played with his hair until he fell asleep. Maybe falling asleep surrounded by his scent and arms would make it all hurt less tomorrow.

[wc: 709 || total: 30,754]

"Oh- ah, sorry," Percy said initially, misunderstanding Leon. He thought that Leon just didn't want him in his bed, didn't want to cuddle until sleep came. He thought he'd made a huge overstep for a moment and scrambled to remove himself from the situation to hide out on the couch, but he didn't get very far. Leon was...crying? Percy paused, staring at him as if he was imagining it. But no, he really was.

"A-ah..." Percy stammered, perching on his knees on the edge of the bed and staring at his upset friend in a panic. He didn't know how to comfort someone who was crying. He froze, eyes wide and brows furrowed, desperately trying to make a plan to help while he listened to Leon cry and ramble. His own emotions rose into his throat and threatened to make it all worse, but he choked them down just as he had in front of his family so many times. "L-Leon, don--" He cut himself off, nearly telling the man not to cry. But that wouldn't help, would it? Had all the times he had to stifle his feelings made them go away or made him feel any better? No, if anything, it made him feel more hopeless and alone. Percy didn't want Leon to feel like him. Leon needed to release all of this, and Percy would take it.

Getting to his feet in between the taller man and the bed, Percy paused again. How did one go about this? His hands hovered, unsure what to do for a moment, before reaching up to touch the soggy hands covering his eyes. He encouraged but didn't force the hands down, before lowering his hands to Leon's upper arms to rub them. His arms would remain open if Leon wanted to take advantage of them, otherwise, he'd continue to stand and try to comfort him the best he could. Leon letting it all out would be the best thing for him, as painful as it was to hear and watch. Why was he still beautiful, even when he was falling apart?

"I want all of that too...but there's...a lot that I want. There's a lot I can't have. I've never liked someone like this, so I don't want to let go of you. It...it's just how it is, I guess. Wasn't in our cards," he said quietly, measuring his words. "How can you let go of me? How can I go back to my empty lab after you've been there? I'll miss you. You were the bright spot of my day. We just don't have a choice. We'll have to accept that our puzzles are missing a piece and try to enjoy the incomplete picture for what it is," Percy said, though he really felt like he was tearing in half or that something was stabbing him in the gut. If only he could put Leon at ease. It took all of his professionalism to steady himself and his voice. "Don't worry. I could never forget you. I'll probably just go back to how life was. I never dated before, so I won't find anyone else. That's fine. I'm... really sorry I forced myself along and made this harder for you. If you want, I can sleep on the couch. I'd been planning to do that anyway. In fact, it's probably not too late for me to go find a hotel if you need some space from me," he spoke calmly, though his hands gently gripped the dark-haired man. He was offering to go, but he desperately, selfishly wanted to stay. "I wish I could fix it, Leon. I really do. I wish there was an answer that would save both of us this m-misery," he said, his voice finally starting to crack, though his face remained strong, yet soft.

As he'd said before, this sucked. He hated it. It made him sick. He didn't want it. As much as he sounded confident in his words, he didn't know how to go back to how it was back home. His mind whirled looking for ways to make it stop hurting. He wanted to watch Leon glide through his kitchen as if it'd been built for him and eat the tasty food he made. He wanted to meet Robin, the dog he'd heard about but yet to see. He wanted his work to be interrupted by Leon's interested questions, or to be scolded for being messy or eating unhealthy stuff while he worked. Who was going to look worried when things blew up in his face? How would going out anywhere work without his intimidating-faced friend scaring strangers and Percy having to balance it out, all the while being infatuated with all of his intense expressions? Who would get angry and have a fit when he lost a spar? Who would touch him just because he preferred touch over words, even when Percy was standoffish? Would whoever bought him indulge in his need for touch, or appreciate his wolfish expressions and intense gazes and the depth of his compassion? Would they appreciate him, or just use him as a living coat hanger? It made him sick to his stomach. For a split second, he wondered if he could be the one to purchase Leon, so everyone would be happy, but no. There was no way. He didn't believe in their cultural system of basically high-class slavery. Percy could never feel good about purchasing a human being, not even Leon. If Leon was with him, he wanted Leon to want to be there of his own free will. Besides, inevitably that'd get out and would wreak havoc on his family name.

He'd never understood the stories he'd read before where both sides of a doomed couple threw their lives away to run away and start fresh without the constraints and complications of their current situations, but he did now. If only he wasn't a Dagger and have all his responsibilities in Fiore, and if only Leon didn't have Hoffman expectations and a fate to achieve. If they could shed both of those and run, maybe they could be happy. Unlike fairytales, though, there was little chance of that being a viable option, no matter how good it sounded.

"I'm sorry. I'm really sorry."

[wc: 1050 || total: 32581]