A Fateful Appearance (Private; Alyia)

Allen stared. The blush not fading from his cheeks. His grip quickly tightened on his red mane but then let go, his trembling limbs falling to his sides. He slowly raised his hand to face him. His arm in front of his chest. He stared at his sweaty, trembling palm before rolling his fingers back into it. His expression grew... angry, or rather frustrated.  

Tears formed in the corners of his golden eyes. He gazed at Alyia, his cheeks flushing with blood. "I... wasn't made to.. love." Allen raised his trembling hands in front of his face, rolling his fingertips back into his palm. His expression softened. "What... what could I offer, if I could trade anything for love? I have lived only in fear, hatred, and darkness. None quite as powerful, or... dangerous at what Khalan says love is to be. I would offer any of my emotions for love... happiness within the heart, the soul... I can't accept the fact that I'm his product, but I can't deny it..."

He walked up to Alyia sniffing her more intently this time. He leaned down to stare straight into her wide, jeweled optics. He growled and slapped his cheeks, wincing at the impact."What am I saying? Look, Alyia. I am not in love! I can't be!"

Allen didn't know what he was saying anymore. But with every word that slipped out of his mouth, may it be truth or lie, he succumbed to the so called 'love'. "Make it stop... please..." He gazed at Alyia, tears nearly running down his cheeks. He didn't know what to do. What to say. How to say it. Did he love Alyia? Should he? Did he yearn for love, or was this just part of his facade? There was only one thing he could do to clarify it...

He spoke softly, but firm. He leaned in closer, his lips tore from each other and pressed against hers once more, sealing it in a kiss. Though the kiss was more lasting than the others, it was less sincere. He pulled away after several seconds, and sighed. "It's still pounding violently... you have... done something to me and I wish I had the answer. But I'm no angel, I'm just me... and I look to others for the... explanations. I can't love, or at least not now." He frowned and leaned outward, sitting down much like a dog, and looking down. In a sullen mood, he twiddled his thumbs together and blushed.

Though, finally mustering up the courage to stay something. To meet the ender of the ice formed from his last actions. "A-and, don't get me wrong. I may just really like your scent.. or blood. Or both..."

He still did not know what to think. He was a confused man introduced to foreign feelings, all at once, he grew paranoid... angry and sad. His heart's rhythm grew steady. Allen smiled. "Nii-san taught me many things within the time I spent here in Magnolia. I'd have to be willing to expose myself to these things in order to accept them. And if love is as good as people say it to be, then maybe falling for you isn't... a bad thing." He whispered.

A sudden calmness consumed him. After the kiss, he still couldn't tell if it were love. The anger, hatred, fear... it still never faded. This was the world that was hiding from him... no, this was the world he was hiding from. He was afraid of change, but was put under the circumstances where change had to be applied. Allen wasn't prepared... it was all so new to him...

It still made no sense.

(OOC: Sorry if the post is a little confusing, typing this at one in the morning. =3=)

Allen only observed Goddess Alyia's countenance and was subjected to shock upon the sight of her emotions taking form in her expression. She was crying. Beads of water ran down her cheeks. Allen listened to her attentively, what did he say? He didn't mean to hurt her! Why was she crying? Why couldn't she stop? He was most likely overthinking this. Or was it the approximate amount of concern needed to pity her? He proceeded to his confusion.

But then words would tear their way out of her mouth and grasped his undivided attention. She spoke, what he considered, words of wisdom. He had been birthed into this world with the mind of a newborn, slowly learning to crawl so he could walk beside Goddess Alyia. But with these words he word exchange with her, with they as painful as she exclaimed?

She stood from her seat and dismissed herself from the building. Allen could only watch, for he had failed to choke out the words he had so desperately wanted her to hear. What should he do? What could he do? As she said, love was a strong thing. Had he been tampering with those passionate emotions so carelessly? Allen resented himself for it. He didn't know what to say; he couldn't even scold himself! He only bared the most divine agitation, sitting there, alone at a table, sitting in his seat, trembling with frustration!

Was he so dumb? Could he not decipher these feelings? He was so afraid of this change, this human heart. His heart started to beat faster and faster, and Goddess Alyia was not even present. Was the very mention of her name so pleasant? Were these beautiful characters forming the beautiful name so appealing? His cheeks flushed a deeper red, choked up his pride, and gave into the temptation. He admitted that he was in love. He no longer fought it. He had no valid reason to deny it. It would only make it worse!

Allen stood from his seat and several minutes after Goddess Alyia, dismissed himself. When he was greeted with a cold air of the outside, he froze upon the sight in front of him. It was Goddess Alyia, but with wings? He couldn't recall a moment when he had set eyes on this. His widened his golden optics and sat on the ground in silence, much like a dog. He stared, and stared, until he choked up some words. "Uhm... I know that something I said or did back there made you upset.. and uhm... well..."

He didn't know what else to say. He simply blushed, and turned his head away. Her wings were pretty.

Allen raised his arm to his chest and clenched it through his clothing, raised himself from the stone crust below and walked up behind Goddess Alyia with a shy look. At first, he was reluctant to throw his arms around her and to pull her into a tender embrace. He was afraid that he'd be rejected, thrown away after he had done such terrible things. He felt ashamed to be in her presence after what he had done. Of course, he was unaware that there were plenty of worse things he could've done but judging from her reaction, he was sickening, right? He wasn't sure of the reality of things. What should he do? Turn away and let it be? Or express his feelings. He took a deep breath and wrapped his trembling arms around her body, tears rolling down his cheeks from golden eyes. And all of a sudden, the weight had lifted from his chest.

"Why won't human emotions, not even my own, work the way we want it to? Love is big and scary. When human beings are presented with things like this, they get afraid. And that fear pushes them to what they call "fight or flight". I want to run from this feeling you give me. You make me feel like my heart is going one hundred miles a hour. You make my face flush as red as my hair. I love you, I can't deny that. I won't deny it. But I just... I don't know how... to treat it." His grip grew tighter as his arms trembled even more, burying his crying face into her beautiful, golden mane. He sniffed it, smiling between tears.

"I love you. I know I said it, but it makes me feel fuzzy when I say. It's a nice feeling. I didn't mean to hurt you, I say this with sincerity! I want to bury my face into your chest and be comforted by you. I want to wrap my arms around your beautiful body and entwine my fingers in your hair. But is that too much to ask after the pain I've caused you? Can those tears I've made you shed are of too much value for the words "I'm sorry" to erase?" Allen didn't know what he was saying. He thought he was speaking nonsense. Several bystanders stopped to look at them, and his chest felt like it'd explode. He raised his head, took a deep breath. And all of a sudden, the murmuring grew silent. He opened his mouth, and spoke.

"I love you, Goddess Alyia! Please stay with me! I promise that I won't hurt you! I promise!"