Settle The Scar • Private, Erika

Every day was a somber day for Erika recently. She hadn't done much research instead she had just tried to catch up on her trashy romance novels and continue about her life. She had taken an extended vacation from her company work after she had retrieved Astrid's Grandmothers wedding ring from the group that stole it from Erika's home, and she didn't wish to focus on running a company right now. Her protege could handle it in her sted, he was smart though his designs were a little gaudy she could always fix it in an instant with a new brand so it was fine. The entirety of her time was now simply devoted to losing it day by day, trying to make herself feel a little less empty over recent events. Many had died by her hands and all because of one purpose, one person that she held value for. Before the past year or so Erika had only cared about a few people, one of which was her teacher Erika, whom she had taken the name from, and Sharp the only one that had seen who Erika was and hadn't judged her... well until a year or so ago. Astrid had seen her in that mansion and didn't judge her, a bitter and hateful individual deep down who tried to conquer her own rage and anger in order to live a better life and help others, out of some form of penance. Was she perfect? No, but that's fine no one was, and yes that included Erika. She knew she was far from perfect, she made up that facade to protect herself from others in a world she hardly knew at the time, and still doesn't know all that much about.

The limited knowledge she has is evident that it took so long for her realize her feelings, and what she really wanted to keep her happy. Power, fame, wealth, all of it was just a tool to an end an end which Erika had never considered beyond acquiring more, but now she realized the point, she had just tallied a body count so high as to keep the coffin business rich for weeks, all for just a small ring that was the property of someone else's family. It was one of the first times she had fought for something that wasn't hers but another. That wasn't entirely true, it was for her in a way, just a different way than she was used to, not that Erika right now would have any of the courage in order to ask in the first place, which was also a first for her, but she had done it for two possible people. Judging by how things had gone with her father though she wasn't sure if anything like that would last, especially if Erika had a longer lifespan than Astrid or if Erika had a shorter lifespan than her, nothing was certain.

As Erika wandered through the peace village she made sure to try and keep the old man's grave with flowers on it, though various animals and kids would sometimes eat or take them she'd show up every week to have some flowers placed there by her own hands out of a sign of respect. She owed him her life, it was just a shame she couldn't have saved him. At least she had saved her fathers and was now trying to grow closer to him, not as his little experiment but as his daughter and he as her father, though she found the calls awkward and hard, she grew the appreciation for knowing someone when they are alive rather than regretting it later, as with the case of the old man. Walking up to the grave site, she was in the same appearance she had when she was here during her recovery period. Getting up to the grave site Erika noticed another nearby, and instantly she felt it was Astrid. Erika for a brief moment contemplating leaving, she hadn't seen her in so long and she didn't know if it was right to disturb her, but she knew that her grandfather would want someone to comfort his little girl in this time since he wasn't around to do it.

Slowly approaching, the assortment of flowers within both hands Erika made sure as to not make much noise, though she was sure the slayer could hear it, and gently placed the flowers down into the vase at the base of the grave.

"He'll like these ones."

leaning down to Astrid's Level Erika wouldn't look at her to prevent Astrid's embarrassment, instead, all she would try and do is place a hand on Astrid's shoulder.

"It's okay Astrid, I don't have anywhere to go, take as long as you need."

All she could do now is just simply be here in this moment, a strange feeling. No words just a prescence, and hopefully it would be enough.

Erika didn't speak when Astrid mentioned the memory, it was her time ti listen, not to question the girl or add to it, at least that's what Erika would want if her father were to pass away now, not advice but an ear to listen. Hopefully if her father should pass Astrid could listen to her as Erika had long since repaired her hearing. Violets were his favorite, well that was obvious due to how many there were, but Astrid thought she killed them by plucking them, she did but everything die's eventually, better to die beautiful than withered right? That was a scary thought to Erika again, her own life span, she had no idea how long she would live, but maybe it was for the best, so she could just enjoy these moments more than if she knew again didn't have the curse of mortality thrust upon her.

Astrid shifted gears and asked about more mundane things, though Erika was happy to reply, it amused her that over their time coming back from the trip they had discovered they liked some of the same stuff, though Erika would never have admitted such objects of enjoyment to anyone else as they were too... degrading in her mind, guilty pleasures mostly.

"They released a new album, but it's mostly about break ups and such, it's not that great to be honest their olderived work is better, still worth a listen I suppose, as for midnight. They finally got together but then there was this weird like imprint thing and a giant fight that never really happened, I don't get why the baby was taboo in the first place, if that baby was taboo then I guess I'm taboo, but whatever, I wanted more but it was fine. Really weird sex scene though, almost like the author was trying to quite their fantasies instead of reality. "

Erika stated with a calm voice, answering truthfully.

"How have you been Astrid? "

There she went, going from pretending to be happy to the real emotion of grieving and sorrow in an instant. When would Astrid learn that being honest with herself was the way to go, yes she had made horrific mistakes and done terrible actions, but if anyone was to not cast the first stone it would be Erika, just how many generations of families had been cut short by her? More than Erika would ever care to remember, and she had a near perfect memory. As the silver-haired girl stopped leaning on Erika in order to cry once more Erika was prepared to listen to her, and to just sit there and be a presence to help her, but looking over towards the side of her face, Erika saw the blood drip down the other side of her cheek from the wound in her eye. Erika didn't understand how that was happening, but she didn't want to allow that to continue. Reaching one of her hands over to Astrid's face to wipe the blood away Erika moved in front of the silver-haired elf. Gently wiping the blood Erika tried her best to make a smile.

"Astrid, everyone does something they regret, but you are alive so don't cry tears of shame, because your grandfather certainly wouldn't cry them, he would cry tears of joy because of how mature you have become."

Erika's own eyes had a shimmer of the stars within them as she started to become a little sentimental right now towards Astrid, and in a rare moment might start crying herself.

"Astrid, I was the one who failed you, I wasn't there for the guild and I wasn't there to save you from getting your eye removed if anything I failed you. I want your forgiveness for that, but more important than that I finally have enough sense and courage now to understand feelings I had never considered before. I know I've said it before to you but..."

Leaning in slowly Erika guided her face to try and match up with Astrid's, Erika's own lips hovering before Astrid's.

"I love you Astrid, no matter how many mistakes, faults, or flaws."

Kissing Astrid Erika would have tears start to fall from her eyes from a feeling of melancholy that she oddly wished wouldn't pass her by, but instead stay within her for a while and shape her to become not a scared running away little dragon, but someone who was worthy of anothers affection, and was mature enough to handle the responsibility of it all. her only regret was it took the death of someone who had been selfless to her, for her to learn this lesson.

Astrid embraced the kiss back which was a relief, Erika couldn't imagine what would have happened if Astrid was like "Nah bro I hate you." Erika would have probably just thrown the ring down her throat and told her to choke on it, especially since Erika had just spent a good couple of months killing every single member of a mafia in a cold-blooded style fashion. That was probably why Erika was so calm down, she had gotten enough murder out of the way for a life well for a long while at least, Erika was sure if need be she could kill more people it wouldn't be that hard but for now the world should consider itself lucky that she had her fill. Pulling back from the kiss which had turned loving, Erika's ears were met by Astrid's words. They were strange, she sounded like she was crying and struggling to get out the words at the same time. Granted she had just been crying and Erika too felt the sting of tears but this was different. Did Astrid just get a speech impediment? She said that she wuved Erika, and Erika couldn't help but let out a chuckle even if it was horrifically insensitive.

"What was that?" Erika laughed slightly, "It was like a little kid!" her voice was a bit elated but one could hear the soft color of sadness among her words, due to the tears still falling if not slowly.

"Well.." Erika stated getting some composure back slightly. "If that's how you say you love someone, I think it's the sweetest sound I could hear."

Putting a faint smile on her face Erika stood up and wiped the tears from her face and tried to become a little more serious right now, even though that would prove difficult beyond momentary bravado. They couldn't spend all day making out in front of a gravestone, well they could but it would be a little weird, and while Astrid's grandpa probably enjoyed the view, that old pervert, Erika didn't think it would be too appropriate to stay here the entire day.

"I have to say though, as much as he probably enjoys the view of the two of us we probably shouldn't sit in front of the grave the entire day, we can come back later, but I doubt that you aren't hungry right now Astrid, and tired. Come on, it's on me."

Erika stated by pulling out and flashing her black lacrima card because of course everything is a lacrima something get over it. Hopefully, it wasn't insensitive to ask for Astrid to leave the grave site, but Erika figured that if Astrid kept crying here she would get a cold, or would never leave and that wasn't healthy, would be better to visit in spurts rather than let the girl sit there for days on end wallowing in self-pitty.

To Erika it was pretty funny how embarrassed Astrid was acting right now, it was just a simple kiss, though Erika could understand it a bit, it was special compared to what Erika had felt before. This kiss was different, it wasn't just for her own satisfaction but to be with another, which while she laughed at Astrid, Astrid was merely expressing easily what Erika was feeling on the inside. She scoffed at herself a bit as she realized she was getting soft after all of this time. Perhaps getting a bit soft wasn't such a bad thing if she could have more moments like this and fewer moments attempting to kill her own father, though she now shuttered at the idea of having to try and kill her own sister and mother. It was inevitable, unlike her father who had tried to help her survive as a child her sister was most likely brainwashed by her mother and her mother was probably completely beyond recovery. As she briefly thought of that Erika got a bit jealous of Astrid, yeah her life hadn't been that great, but at least she knew some parents and wasn't just a tool for the longest time. Perhaps Erika just killing all those people and trying to take over was her just lashing out at her parent for treating her so terribly, or maybe it was just her inner desire to conquer, or maybe both.

Or perhaps none of it mattered because Astrid was now pulling a stunt of pretending to be unable to walk. That was a load, she totally could who did she think she was fooling... wait was Astrid getting revenge on Erika for oh so long ago when she had Astrid carry her back? Astrid could hold a grudge!? That's a surprise, she normally wasn't so... malicious. Could Erika be having an effect on her or did Astrid change a bit in the few months she was gone? It was probably that she had changed, maybe grown up a little bit became less naive? Maybe the two of them were rubbing off on each other a little too much, though not in that way at least not yet anyway.

"I didn't know you could hold a grudge, Astrid... Oh well, come on."

Erika could have lifted her up with threads, she could have just moved the space around her to have her float there, but despite the fact that Erika knew it would be harder, she bent down and picked up Astrid in her arms, and hoisted her up. Erika would have to focus a bit to make it so she was strong enough for the time being to keep this up and not ruin the moment, but if she was going to do it, and fair was fair, Astrid actually carried her, so Erika would actually carry Astrid. Cradling her legs in her left arm and back in her right Erika looked down at Astrid and smiled.

"Well then my princess you know this village better than me, point the way to your favorite spots, and I shall carry you away."

Erika didn't reply to Astrid, she knew that no matter what she said, Astrid wouldn't be convinced that Erika believed her, mostly because Astrid still blamed herself for everything. In reality, Erika should have been there to stop all of it, but she was too busy off taking care of other business, distracted and away, leaving the guild and everyone vulnerable. Now Astrid was missing an eye, and blamed herself for everything, Erika really did suck at this whole defense thing, didn't she? Well, Erika never had to defend anything before, and this was half the reason why she never wanted to because she knew people would come after those she grew a fondness for and Erika didn't know if she could save them. This feeling of vulnerability left Erika feeling desperate to get stronger, but she didn't know how she possibly could. She had reached the peak of her magical capabilities and she probably couldn't get stronger.

As she held Astrid in her arms and Erika saw her fall asleep, she started to view that none of that mattered right now. Erika could worry about the future and all the worries and possibilities and just focus on the moment. At this moment she held Astrid and could count herself as happy. While she could worry about what the future would bring and all the hardships she would have to endure, right now she just needed to focus on what was important and the person who needed her. Erika felt weird at this thought as she walked around the outskirts of the town towards Astrid's grandfather's house, though she supposed it was now Astrid's house. For the first time, she wasn't just holding her own heart within her hands but another's heart, and Erika was both happy and terrified at this prospect.

Arriving at the grandfather's house Erika opened the door with a few simple threads and went into what she presumed was Astrid's old room, the room which still had all the girly wallpaper and dolls. Erika noticed a few of the dolls were cute, she didn't have any as a child so she was a little jealous that Astrid had so many, though Astrid's life wasn't easy either for different reasons. Still, if Erika had gotten at least one teddy bear she would have been happy, oh well no use in crying over such things, when Erika could try and be productive. This house was completely out of sorts, and it was up to Erika to make sure that it would be up to snuff.

In an instant, several clones appeared within the house and Erika placed her hands on her hips and smiled towards them.

"Alright, let's clean this entire place up!"

"Well, of course, all of you can clean it up, I'll supervise."

"Wait... you are going to supervise? I'm not doing petty work."

"Exactly, why should I do the work, we should just get some kids off the street to do all the work, the payment is we don't kill their families."

Exasperated Erika threw her hands into the air. "LOOK, I made you guy's you have to do what I want, now get to cleaning!"

"just because you made us doesn't mean we are your slaves."

"We demand equal rights!"

"I won't be oppressed just because of someone's foolish ego!"

Frustrated Erika started to boil under her own skin. "I'm not arguing this." At that moment she shut down their personalities, so she wouldn't have to listen to herself insult her. In their last gasping moments the clones shouted out, "You can't hide... the truth..." but Erika was far past this entire distraction, and in that instant, she forced them to change into maid outfits, mostly to mock them but also because if they were to work they should be dressed for it right? That and Astrid had some weird accent that reminded Erika of maids for some reason.

As the clones got to work cleaning up the room, Erika decided despite the time of day she would attempt to cook something, though Erika didn't know when Astrid would wake up she figured it wouldn't be too long, since Astrid tended to wake up at weird times, concerning but she didn't tell Erika about it so Erika didn't ask right now, that and Astrid might be over it. Still Erika would try and cook slowly so it didn't get cold... that or Erika could always heat it up with her flames... that sure would be fun.

Erika had heard Astrid walking into the kitchen, but she still didn't know how to face the elf. Erika was making something that was precious to her but would seem silly to others, especially given Erika's personality around most. The dragon had always loved pancakes, and not just because of their taste, the fluffy food held a special place in her normally blackened heart.

"Pancakes..."

Erika said with just a tinge of nervousness in her voice, as she knew Astrid would slightly make fun of her.

"I'm almost done, you take a seat and I'll serve you."

Erika would state as she made sure to keep flipping the flapjacks to make sure the density was just right. While Erika viewed making clothes as a pleasure, this was her passion but she didn't view it would make enough money to help her with her conquest, or at least influence of the world so she didn't pursue it, instead, she made her fashion company. As Erika had calmed down from her previous passion, mostly due to how she was turning soft from the happiness she felt for once in her life, Erika grew to regret that decision. Perhaps Erika could leave her company in charge of one of her proteges, take a pension and move on to making a restaurant. She could have it be small time, run by her clones, that could be fun and save on labor costs... well she'd have to make sure her cooking was perfect. Assuming that Astrid had sat down at the prepared table, Erika would serve her just one pancake, just in case, Astrid didn't enjoy it.

"Here you go."

Placing the buttermilk pancake in front of Astrid, Erika would also place a cup with syrup and a stick of butter on a tray as well.

"The syrup is imported from... Enca, there are rare trees which grow on the water and produce a syrup which blends well with buttermilk, though if you want raisin or blueberry the syrup from fiore is probably better as it's less sweet and thus doesn't compete with the flavor... anyway I hope you like it."

Astrid liked it? Good, because if she hadn't liked it Erika might have shot her again, probably in the other eye. Joking aside, it would have been the heart because that's what would break on Erika. Thankfully Astrid enjoyed it and asked what else Erika knew how to cook. That was a complicated question as Erika KNEW how to cook a lot, but she had never tried cooking too much, perhaps she should try cooking at least a little bit if Astrid liked it. Oh Erika what was becoming of her, doing things because someone else wanted her to, she was clearly going soft. Erika didn't like the fact that she was going soft, it meant she would lack her instincts, but for once in her life she wanted to have what she always wanted deep down, something normal and happy. She had tried to live up to her potential and she saw where it got her, misery. She was powerful, no doubt about it but now Erika felt she had hit the peak of her performance, without some kind of divine intervention Erika couldn't go beyond her limits now without risking her own life, so she'd just have to make do.

"I've mostly cooked breakfast because... my father he, well don't laugh. He didn't really care too much about me in the sense of, I had what I needed and beyond that, it wasn't much, but on my birthday he would always cook me breakfast. He said it's all he knew how to do, and I watched him and learned how he did it. To me, it's a bit special because it was one of the few times I saw much affection, well illogical affection, so I thought you might want to share a bit in it since I know you've probably been depressed for months."

Erika glared.

"Don't try and deny it, I know you well enough, and I may have peeked a bit into your memories, I can tell you that dragons do like scars, but I don't think that's why I'd say you are pretty. I think you are pretty..."

Erika walked to the kitchen to retrieve the rest of the meal, and a bit for herself before placing some more on the table for Astrid to pick and choose at her pleasure.

"I don't have to hold up barriers around you, so... to me that makes you really pretty."

As she said those words Erika's blonde hair changed to black, and her eyes a red. Her body type adjusted a bit, and if one were trying to sense it, they could tell her mana's feeling changed from human to draconic. Adjusting her clothes Erika did a dramatic hair flip because even when soft she has to try and be a little arrogant. Looking at Astrid she tried to pull out a smile.

"It feels weird right now to be like this, I don't know if I like it so I have to ask, do you? Being myself I mean, not wearing a disguise or being someone else. Also please tell me you don't like waffles more than pancakes, I can't take that heartbreak."

Astrid freaked out when Erika stole her memories to see what she was up to in those four months that Astrid was gone. Erika was worried as people don't just vanish for a long time for no reason, good or bad, thankfully this time it was mostly good, Astrid could have done without the depression but that's fine Erika could solve depression.

"Privacy is a very subjective word, I like to think of it as... making sure someone is okay. I mean you weren't going to tell me what you did and what was wrong, so I knew to help I had to take a small peak. Seriously though dragon saliva, you aren't going to ask me to spit in your eye right?"

Erika was making a joke on that last part, but she really hoped that Astrid didn't want Erika to spit her in the eye, that would be really weird. Erika wasn't even sure she had healing powers like that anyway, maybe her bodily fluids could heal but in what situation would Erika ever have to use them to cure Astrid or something afflicting her. Clearly, that would never happen. Regardless Astrid stated how she liked pancakes more than waffles, this was good as she didn't want to have to dump Astrid because she liked such an inferior product of breakfast. Erika COULD eat waffles if it was the only thing left but beyond that, she wouldn't touch the foolish creations. Whoever made the waffle was her mortal enemy. She wouldn't suffer such treachery in her household. Erika was a bit embarrassed though when Astrid said how much she enjoyed seeing Erika's real body, or at least the one she was supposed to have growing up, thanks, Dad.


"Well, I'm glad you like seeing the real me because I'm not going to change it around you unless it's in public, I'm still worried about people knowing who I am, or sensing what I am. You'd have noticed I feel like a dragon magically right? See how would people react to that out in public, sounds weird but I don't want to attract a lot of attention just because of what I am."

Erika wasn't really showing weakness right now just, she didn't want to have a bunch of problems appear because she was a dragon and someone would freak out about it. Sure the war happened a long time ago and Erika wasn't around for it but if any feelings still lingered then it would be bad. it's all that stupid Acnologia's fault anyway for being such a massive jerk and killing so many people. Sure Erika had killed a lot of people but not as a dragon so that wasn't relevent to this topic of conversation.

"Say... Astrid, did you know I'm part phoenix? My Dad was from a dragon clan so he had dragon in him, but he made me more like a proper dragon so I wouldn't die after being born, but my mom is a phoenix. So, I don't think I can revive from ashes or anything but it's how I can use my clones, I'm also a bit of a freak dragon wise... I don't have scaley wings instead I have feathered ones. It's embarrassing for me but I peeked into your mind so I guess it's only fair."

Manifesting wings her wings on her back, they were smaller than if she was a dragon but they were the same thing, white feathered wings. Erika felt odd talking about herself like this and it was a bit random but she wanted to show Astrid how much she trusted her right now, that and she didn't want to hide anything since they hadn't spoken in four months. That and she had already expressed her love of pancakes so why not go for broke right now.

"Yeah, it's random but we didn't speak for months and I just want to get everything in the open rather than hide it, because I didn't know if you were coming back at all and that... well... I didn't like that idea."