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    Haven God Slayer. Orokana

    Orokana Yuhi
    Orokana Yuhi

    Player 
    Lineage : Bringer of Death
    Position : None
    Posts : 36
    Cosmic Coins : 0
    Dungeon Tokens : 0
    Experience : 325

    Completed Haven God Slayer. Orokana

    Post by Orokana Yuhi on 30th June 2019, 9:10 am

    Magic

    Magic Name: Haven God Slayer
    Magic Type: Slayer Magic
    Description: Haven God Slayer magic is the very magic that destroys the heavens themselves. That turns the most holy things into dark and corrupted impurities. The power of unholy light that can kill any holy god or being of holy light is something that is forbidden and very taboo. Prefect for a lich trying to make all fear him and worship him.
    Orokana uses this dark power mostly to buff his unholy power and bodies, though that doesnt mean he doesnt have string attacks for it as well. Orokana mainly uses these to make himself stronger and harder to deal with then normal, giving him a longer time to be on the battle field and making his attacks shake the very earth. This is only the start of what a dreadlord will look like.
    Unique Abilities:

    • Ability: If a shield is broken during the duration of the shield, Orokana will unleash a aoe attack once per post (damage, size, and speed is the same as the right rank)
      Damage: 30
      Size: 60
      Speed: 30
    • Ability:
    • Ability:


    Spells:

    Name: Dark Havens Lord
    Rank: C
    Type: Single target
    Damage: 120hp
    Range: 10m
    Speed: 10mps
    Duration: 7 posts
    Downside: less range and speed for more duration and damage
    Description: This spell will give Orokana a shield barrier around his body. Turning him and anything he is holding or wearing into a dark black shadowy visage. Only his glowing red eyes glowing in the darkness. Once the barrier takes enough damage it will fade and he will look normal again.

    Name: Dark Havens Fury
    Rank: C
    Type: Area of Effect
    Damage: 5% (burn effect)
    Range: 60
    Speed: 60
    Duration: 10
    Downside: Less range, speed, and damage for longer duration
    Description: When activated the spell will give everything that isnt Orokana, and his summons, a burn effect of 5% each post in the spell. As well as they are slowed by 55% in each post in the AOE effect. The spell is a large colourless sphere around Orokana, where all colour is faded to different forms of grays and blacks.

    Name: The Speed of Dark Light
    Rank: C
    Type: Burst
    Damage: 60
    Range: 120
    Speed: 120
    Duration: 5
    Downside:
    Description: The spell is a dark beam of light, firing from Orokanas finger tips, once fired the spell also teleports Orokana to where the beam hits. While Orokana has this effect on, black sparks of light fly off of him.

    Name: Judgement of the Dark Heavens
    Rank: C+
    Type: Burst
    Damage: 90hp
    Range: 160m
    Speed: 160mps
    Duration: 10
    Downside: Less range and speed for longer duration
    Description: The spell gives Orokana or one other a shield of black light. When the shield is on they get 85% more spell power for the duration. And Orokana gets 5% health back per post.


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    Haven God Slayer. Orokana OroSig_80
    Saraphina
    Saraphina

    Alt Account- Quality Badge Level 1 - Quality Badge Level 2 - Quality Badge Level 3 - Guild Master- A-Rank- Christian Minecraft Server- I Have Friends...- Teaming Up!- Limited Edition- Unknown Powerhouse- Guild Creator- Achiever- Character Application Approved! - Magic Application Approved!- Get A Pet!- Complete Your First Job!- Obtain A Lineage! - Join A Faction!- Senior [500]- X-Mas Event Participant- Player 
    Lineage : Blizzard's Frostburn
    Position : None
    Posts : 1073
    Guild : Errings Rising - GM
    Dungeon Tokens : 0
    Experience : 145,037

    Character Sheet
    First Magic: Aspect of Divinity
    Second Magic:
    Third Magic:

    Completed Re: Haven God Slayer. Orokana

    Post by Saraphina on 2nd July 2019, 8:18 pm

    Hey there Orokana! I'm Saraphina and I'll be your grader today. My edits will be in this color so keep a look out for it please. If you have any questions, you can dm me or ask in the thread. Once the edits are done, please bump the thread.

    To start off with, as this is your second magic, somewhere in the magic please link the approval for the slayer position, and the proof of purchase or your training thread ^^

    Spoiler:

    @Orokana Yuhi wrote:Magic

    Magic Name: Haven God Slayer
    Magic Type: Slayer Magic
    Description: Haven God Slayer magic is the very magic that destroys the heavens themselves. That turns the most holy things into dark and corrupted impurities. The power of unholy light that can kill any holy god or being of holy light is something that is forbidden and very taboo. Prefect for a lich trying to make all fear him and worship him.
    Orokana uses this dark power mostly to buff his unholy power and bodies, though that doesnt mean he doesnt have string attacks for it as well. Orokana mainly uses these to make himself stronger and harder to deal with then normal, giving him a longer time to be on the battle field and making his attacks shake the very earth. This is only the start of what a dreadlord will look like.
    Unique Abilities:

    • Ability: If a shield is broken during the duration of the shield, Orokana will unleash a aoe attack once per post (damage, size, and speed is the same as the right rank) This also needs a set duration capped by rank.
      Damage: 30
      Size: 60
      Speed: 30
    • Ability:
    • Ability:


    Spells:

    Name: Dark Havens Lord
    Rank: C
    Type: Single target
    Damage: 120hp
    Range: 10m
    Speed: 10mps
    Duration: 7 posts Please lower this to 5 posts max
    Downside: less range and speed for more duration and damage You cannot trade speed and range for more duration, and you need to state % of range and speed for how much more damage/durability you're trying to get. Also, base increases cannot surpass 50% of their base value. So the most you could up your damage is to 90HP.
    Description: This spell will give Orokana a shield barrier around his body. Turning him and anything he is holding or wearing into a dark black shadowy visage. Only his glowing red eyes glowing in the darkness. Once the barrier takes enough damage it will fade and he will look normal again. Just a note, Shields have a Durability rather than damage, which is up to 3x damage for its durability.^^

    Name: Dark Havens Fury
    Rank: C
    Type: Area of Effect
    Damage: 5% (burn effect)
    Range: 60
    Speed: 60 Please lower to 30 meters per second
    Duration: 10 Same as before
    Downside: Less range, speed, and damage for longer duration Durations cannot be extended via downsides at all. You also say you're reducing speed and range, but you have the full value for range and double the speed base value.
    Description: When activated the spell will give everything that isnt Orokana, and his summons, a burn effect of 5% each post in the spell. As well as they are slowed by 55% in each post (can you state for the duration please?) in the AOE effect. The spell is a large colourless sphere around Orokana, where all colour is faded to different forms of grays and blacks.

    Name: The Speed of Dark Light
    Rank: C
    Type: Burst
    Damage: 60
    Range: 120 Please lower this to 30 meters
    Speed: 120 Please lower this to 30 meters per second
    Duration: 5
    Downside:
    Description: The spell is a dark beam of light, firing from Orokanas finger tips, once fired the spell also teleports Orokana to where the beam hits Please state that this is done once per post. While Orokana has this effect on, black sparks of light fly off of him.

    Name: Judgement of the Dark Heavens
    Rank: C+
    Type: Burst
    Damage: 90hp
    Range: 160m C+ burst range is 45 meters, please lower this
    Speed: 160mps C+ burst speed is 45 meters per second, please lower this.
    Duration: 10 C+ spell duration is 6 posts, please lower it
    Downside: Less range and speed for longer duration Again, you cannot trade for longer duration.
    Description: The spell gives Orokana or one other a shield of black light. When the shield is on they get 85% more spell power for the duration. And Orokana gets 5% health back per post. May you please clarify if 'spell power' is Spell Damage or Magic Power please ^^


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      Current date/time is 20th October 2019, 12:47 pm