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    Abyss Foundation Magic

    Veil Yami
    Veil Yami

    Player 
    Lineage : None
    Position : None
    Posts : 33
    Guild : Rune Knight
    Cosmic Coins : 0
    Dungeon Tokens : 0
    Age : 1557
    Experience : 200

    Character Sheet
    First Magic: Abyss Foundation Magic
    Second Magic:
    Third Magic:

    Abyss Foundation Magic Empty Abyss Foundation Magic

    Post by Veil Yami on 7th June 2019, 7:48 am

    Magic

    Magic Name: Abyss Foundation Magic
    Magic Type: Lost Magic/Abyss (Prevalent)
    Description: Abyss magic is one of the oldest of the Lost Magic types, drawing on the abyss itself it has a highly fluid nature allowing the mage to cast a variety of spells, each one unique to itself. A form of Magic that is centered around the Abyss. It allows the user to conjure, control, and manipulate the Abyss as they will it. It can take many forms from the most simplest of teleportation magic to creating new dimension.

    Strengths:

    • Masterful fluid of spell types
    • Large number of spells
    • being a non elemental type it has no known weaknesses.

    Weaknesses:

    • Calling into the abyss can pull things that seek to control the caster, a dangerous magic.
    • Abyss magic is volatile, careful control is needed to keep it from destroying the caster.
    • An all consuming magic, it can turn on friend as easily as foe. Requires intense focus and preparation.

    Unique Abilities:

    • Ability:Focused Drawing (Passive): Abyss magic is a fluid type allowing it to do a variety of magic spells including attack, defense, support, area, and summon.
    • Ability:Formulation Matrix (Passive): Grants Veil perfect detailed memory regarding knowledge, such as books, history and spells. It grants him proficiency in a variety of knowledge-based skills, such as injury treatment, medicines, navigation etc. This stacks and synergies with his spells that allow him to analyse magic. In character, it takes shape as a mind library.
    • Ability:Ancestral Superiority (Passive/Social): Abyss is a powerful magic, easily one of the oldest, being the very magic that created all magic it is theorized, which have become a fundamental aspect in almost all magic today. This age results in the invoked magic possessing a very large level of intimidation factor as most beings can feel that the mere presence of this Lost Magic is pressing down on them and, for mages, disturbing their own magic, as if readying it to be broken down.



    Spells: As a starter character at D rank, you start off with 4 spells.


    Name: Abyss Gate
    Rank: D
    Type: Summon
    Damage: 10 hp
    Range: Can Summon the monster anywhere in a 90 meter radius
    Speed: 60 meters p/s
    Duration: Till defeated
    Downside: N/A
    Description: A black gate opens and allows a single minor abyss creature to emerge, it can fight by using sharp claws or 2 D rank spells, one being a mouth beam and the other a radius blast of 90 meters to self destruct.
    Strengths: Physically strong, can handle double damage
    Weaknesses: Weak against holy magic


    Name: Abyss defender
    Rank: D
    Type: Defensive/Counter
    Damage: Absorbs 40 hp damage
    Range: 60 m/s
    Speed: 60m/s
    Duration: 3 posts
    Downside: 2 post cooldown
    Description: A orb of blackness covers the magic user, absorbing the damage into itself and transferring half the magic to the caster
    Strengths: Absorbs half the magics spell

    [/list]
    Weaknesses: Higher Ranked spells can shatter the barrier


    Name: Abyss Slashers
    Rank: D
    Type: Multiple persons
    Damage: 30 hp per hit
    Range: 45 meters
    Speed: 30 meters/s
    Duration: 3 posts
    Downside: 1 post cooldown
    Description: A black wind blows in, visible to the eye and screams across the battlefield in a eerie voice, the black wind slashes anything it touches
    Strengths: Can cause severe bleeding

    Weaknesses: Visible to the naked eye

    Name:Abyss Field
    Rank: D
    Type: AoE
    Damage: 0
    Range: 30 m/s
    Speed: 15 m/s
    Duration: 3 posts
    Downside: 2 post cooldown
    Description: The caster coats a entire area in the abyss, this spell blocks all senses of D and C mages except the user, even slayers noses are blocked
    Strengths: Blocks all senses

    Weaknesses: holy magic can cut through the darkness

    Name: Abyss Enhance
    Rank: D+
    Type: Burst.
    Damage: none
    Range: 22.5 Meters
    Speed: 25 meters p/s
    Duration: 3 posts
    Downside: 2 post cooldown
    Description: While in darkness, the casters physical strength and speed are increased by 75%
    Strengths: Physical enhancement

    [/list]
    Weaknesses: Only works in the dark.
    Saraphina
    Saraphina

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    Lineage : Blizzard's Frostburn
    Position : None
    Posts : 1058
    Guild : Errings Rising - GM
    Dungeon Tokens : 0
    Experience : 145,037

    Character Sheet
    First Magic: Aspect of Divinity
    Second Magic:
    Third Magic:

    Abyss Foundation Magic Empty Re: Abyss Foundation Magic

    Post by Saraphina on 8th June 2019, 12:20 pm

    Hey Veil! I'm Saraphina and I'll be your grader today. My edits will be in this color so keep a look out for it please. If you have any questions, you can dm me or ask in the thread. Once the edits are done, please bump the thread.

    First things first though, Strengths and Weaknesses are no longer a thing and aren't required in magic. Same goes for Cooldowns, unless you're exchanging them for something more. You also have 4 normal D rank spells instead of the allowed 3 at D rank, so you'll need to either remove one, or move it up to another spell rank for now.

    Spoiler:

    @Veil Yami wrote:Magic

    Magic Name: Abyss Foundation Magic
    Magic Type: Lost Magic/Abyss (Prevalent) May you state if this is Solitary, Primary, or Auxiliary please?
    Description: Abyss magic is one of the oldest of the Lost Magic types, drawing on the abyss itself it has a highly fluid nature allowing the mage to cast a variety of spells, each one unique to itself. A form of Magic that is centered around the Abyss. It allows the user to conjure, control, and manipulate the Abyss as they will it. It can take many forms from the most simplest of teleportation magic to creating new dimension.

    Strengths:

    • Masterful fluid of spell types
    • Large number of spells
    • being a non elemental type it has no known weaknesses.

    Weaknesses:

    • Calling into the abyss can pull things that seek to control the caster, a dangerous magic.
    • Abyss magic is volatile, careful control is needed to keep it from destroying the caster.
    • An all consuming magic, it can turn on friend as easily as foe. Requires intense focus and preparation.

    Unique Abilities:

    • Ability:Focused Drawing (Passive): Abyss magic is a fluid type allowing it to do a variety of magic spells including attack, defense, support, area, and summon.
    • Ability:Formulation Matrix (Passive): Grants Veil perfect detailed memory regarding knowledge, such as books, history and spells. It grants him proficiency in a variety of knowledge-based skills, such as injury treatment, medicines, navigation etc. This stacks and synergies with his spells that allow him to analyse magic. In character, it takes shape as a mind library.
    • Ability:Ancestral Superiority (Passive/Social): Abyss is a powerful magic, easily one of the oldest, being the very magic that created all magic it is theorized, which have become a fundamental aspect in almost all magic today. This age results in the invoked magic possessing a very large level of intimidation factor as most beings can feel that the mere presence of this Lost Magic is pressing down on them and, for mages, disturbing their own magic, as if readying it to be broken down.


    At D rank, you only get one UA, two of these will have to be locked till B and S rank. These UAs also can be considered plot abilities instead ^^

    Spells: As a starter character at D rank, you start off with 4 spells.


    Name: Abyss Gate
    Rank: D
    Type: Summon Please include Single Target, Multiple Target, Area of Effect, or Burst as the Type
    Damage: 10 hp D rank summons only deal 5 HP damage
    Range: Can Summon the monster anywhere in a 90 meter radius
    Speed: 60 meters p/s
    Duration: Till defeated D rank spells have a max 3 posts
    Downside: N/A
    Description: A black gate opens and allows a single minor abyss creature to emerge, it can fight by using sharp claws or 2 D rank spells, one being a mouth beam and the other a radius blast of 90 meters to self destruct. May you clarify this a bit please? Is the spell able to deal 2x D rank spell damage or cast 2 D rank spells from the magic?
    Strengths: Physically strong, can handle double damage
    Weaknesses: Weak against holy magic
    You need to either change this spell or add Summoning in to your magic type as a Primary or Auxiliary. If you do change the magic type, this will need to use the Summoning/Requip spell template instead. Please bare in mind that summons themselves use burst ranges and speeds, and the abilities follow the summon ability tables.

    Name: Abyss defender
    Rank: D
    Type: Defensive/Counter Please include Single Target, Multiple Target, Area of Effect, or Burst as the Type
    Damage: Absorbs 40 hp damage Defensive spells can take a maximum of three spells of their rank.
    Range: 60 m/s
    Speed: 60m/s
    Duration: 3 posts
    Downside: 2 post cooldown
    Description: A orb of blackness covers the magic user, absorbing the damage into itself and transferring half the magic to the caster You can't take damage and convert it to MP. Please rework this spell, and bear in mind that adsorptions need percentages.
    Strengths: Absorbs half the magics spell

    [/list]
    Weaknesses: Higher Ranked spells can shatter the barrier
    Unless this is an AoE spell, you can have only 1 effect, Counter and absorption are both separate effects.

    Name: Abyss Slashers
    Rank: D
    Type: Multiple persons
    Damage: 30 hp per hit
    Range: 45 meters
    Speed: 30 meters/s
    Duration: 3 posts
    Downside: 1 post cooldown
    Description: A black wind blows in, visible to the eye and screams across the battlefield in a eerie voice, the black wind slashes anything it touches
    Strengths: Can cause severe bleeding

    Weaknesses: Visible to the naked eye

    Name:Abyss Field
    Rank:  D
    Type:  AoE
    Damage: 0
    Range:  30 m/s
    Speed: 15 m/s
    Duration: 3 posts
    Downside: 2 post cooldown
    Description: The caster coats a entire area in the abyss, this spell blocks all senses of D and C mages except the user, even slayers noses are blocked
    Strengths: Blocks all senses

    Weaknesses: holy magic can cut through the darkness

    Name: Abyss Enhance
    Rank: D+
    Type:  Burst.
    Damage: none
    Range: 22.5 Meters
    Speed: 25 meters p/s
    Duration: 3 posts
    Downside: 2 post cooldown
    Description: While in darkness, the casters physical strength and speed are increased by 75% Please include 'for the spells duration' here.
    Strengths: Physical enhancement

    [/list]
    Weaknesses: Only works in the dark.


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      Current date/time is 18th October 2019, 3:47 am