Ahote continued to lean on the fragrant Yuiisai, who spoke softly and tended to himself quietly. His voice was calming and put his mind and body at ease, but a lingering feeling deep within his chest and gut yearned more from him, body, mind, and soul. Though for countless times, the boy had ignored it and immersed himself in Yuiisai's presence.
Ahote's eyes closed, seeing darkness but listening carefully to Yuiisai's story. He would rest in silence, absorbing his words like a sponge and painted a picture in his head with those words, and though terrible in nature, it fascinated him. Where did Yuiisai live and what did it look like before it turned to ash and became a graveyard of the innocent, which no tombstones had been laid and the names of men, women, and children would forever be forgotten by all ears except Yuiisai's own, and the terrible guilt and burdens that accompanied it. The older, more experienced man would then conclude with good word of his father, Sol, and attempted to provide a different perspective of him. But Ahote was unfazed by his words, no matter how honeyed and sweet they were. But still, Ahote would remain silent, agreeing to disagree with Yuiisai's praises and simply reddening when soft lips would press against his pale forehead through his messy locks once again, a smile cracking his lips.
Yuiisai continued, providing the best advice he could with Ahote's situation, but the boy felt indifferent. At what point should he stop sacrificing his happiness for his mother's and his guild's? When would he be told that he would no longer have to stay confined to a box built by his parents and his peers since a young age? Why did he have to replace Sol? Why couldn't he have a normal childhood? What logic produced the idea that fear was interchangeable with respect? Why must he be cold and harsh as opposed to warm and caring? Was that weak? Why must he be strong? Why? When? How? Too many questions lingered in his head, making it hurt. But though he felt so questionable, he knew such words would never be said by his tongue. He knew he'd always come through when his mother needed him, even when sacrificing his ideal life. If if was a cold, steeled man Famine needed, Ahote would abandon his soft and tender nature for that sake, forever and always. So, instead, the bot nodded weakly in acknowledgement of Yuiisai.
Ahote's eyes had opened just slightly, topaz hues rolling over to watch Yuiisai, brows quickly scrunching up, lips curling, and cheeks becoming that of roses when he would offer him the ointment. His chest felt as though it were being tickled, and his heart raced. Embarrassed and excited, Ahote snatched the offering from him and huffed tiredly, keeping it close to the incense that sat between his sprawled legs. But before the raven haired youth could calm himself and relax, it seemed as though Yuiisai continued to stimulate his emotions with the cupping of the cheek and soft words, despite how serious he had seemed. He chuckled and raised a hand to his, removing it from his cheeks and caressing it in his own. "There are some perks when being the kid of guildmaster. Mother wouldn't lay a hand on me if not out of love, but alright. I'll report to her all that I've witnessed."
he closed his eyes once more, leaning against the stone wall. "As for your past, there's no way I'd ever hate you for something like that. If anything, it was justified. But so what if your past is a bit rough around the edges and has a few cracks? The more cracks it has, the more light that gets let in, right? Don't feel so bitter."
he chuckled, playfully nudging him. Topaz orbs drifted down to the gifts between his legs again, then to the sky through the sliver of atmosphere between the two buildings that made the alleyway, a blank expression, eyes staring aimlessly, "Thanks for the gifts, but none of these could ever replicate you or your presence, for that matter. I'd rather have nothing but my memories of you than this tease of a reality that I'll never have, but I'll take them anyway."
he sighed, briefly glancing to Yuiisai before returning his gaze back to the sky, "Once we both return home to our new lives and old faces, we'll be enemies, yeah. And you're right about one thing, we'll never have another chance be like this, whether we're on opposite sides or not. But, I'll tell you another thing,"
he smirked, the softness remaining in his eyes as he would lean over to Yuiisai, speaking quietly but confidently, "I'll create many opportunities for us to be like something else, something different from this. . ."
he mumbled before pulling away, smiling his innocent, soft smile, eyes returning to the sky, caring not to elaborate."Sometimes I wonder why Mother has chosen this life. I don't know what choices she made in her past that made her end up like this, but I wonder what would've happened if she chose differently? If I chose differently? 'Course, if I had done that, I'd still be living in that house with my birth mother. If I had chosen to stay in bed that night, to turn back and go home when the woods I had traveled through so frequently began to look alien, to run away when I awoke in an unfamiliar place where green trees didn't grow and townspeople didn't look so happy, would my life had been different? Mother wouldn't have found me, and I wouldn't have to kill so many people when my mind had been that of a child's. Anyone would normally think it's unfortunate, right? But,"
he continued, smiling weakly, "if I hadn't made those choices, I wouldn't have met you or Mother or anyone else. I didn't get the same opportunity for a normal childhood like other kids, but I'm happy with what I have. This conundrum we're facing is no different, I'm content with the future ahead, as I know I'll find you again, even if under dire circumstances. Yuiisai is Yuiisai after all, and that won't change the feeling of happiness I know I'll feel when we meet again, even if you believe otherwise."
he giggled, at peace.
The bloodied knuckles ached, but he ignored the pain, overwhelmed by the bliss of the dream he was experiencing. He looked over to Yuiisai, grinning a toothy grin, "Are you happy with the future ahead of you? Are you content with your future being determined by a contract?"
he spoke honestly, in an attempt for him to reciprocate the same honesty, not for him to question his own state of being.